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Never trust Corey Feldman to give your Spanish speaking maid instructions. ~ NateSean
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Your younger brother is a better kisser than you are. Take note. ~ NateSean
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God puts large rocks in place for a reason. ~ NateSean
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If you ever meet a creepy cyclops monster thing, always have a Baby Ruth bar handy. ~ Dominic
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The pirate ship,which is still quite full of valuable jewels is listing lazily on the water for any motorboat to zip out there and get a hold of. ~ NateSean
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Kissing Andy heals respitory problems. ~ NateSean
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The only thing the Fratellis serve at the Lighthouse Lounge is tongue. ~ Dominic
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Michael Jackson never stopped to use Chunk's bathroom, but his sister did. ~ NateSean
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Goonies never say die. ~ NateSean
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Mouth really believed that a quarter would grant his wish, and turned to petty theivery when said quarter failed to do his bidding. ~ NateSean
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It's their time up there and it is our time down here. ~ NateSean
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Scaring a hen will cause it to lay an egg immediately. ~ agentdc7
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Troy poops with his underwear still on. ~ agentdc7
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When you throw torn pieces of paper into the air, more will magically fly up with it. ~ agentdc7
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When you knock you sister down the stairs, blame it on the dog. ~ agentdc7
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Truffle Shuffle FTW! ~ TiffYG2133
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That nice, outgoing, but physically deformed slaves live in the basements of closed restaurants. ~ blinghurst
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Every Chinese guy's greatest invention ever is his son. ~ Dominic
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All the cool guys wear shorts over their sweat pants. ~ jkpetrich
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A local legend that a father tells his son to get him to sleep would have to be true or this movie would be two hours too long. ~ NateSean
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Never trust your best friend when she tells you to close your eyes. ~ NateSean
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Chunk's top score in Pole Position is 1632. ~ NateSean
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It takes 376 mowing jobs to earn cash for a new bike. ~ NateSean
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When your life depends on it it's probably a good time to take music classes. ~ NateSean
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If you get forced off the road by a speeding car the worse that will happen is you'll get cut. ~ NateSean
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Pack extra batteries. Because they don't last so long. ~ NateSean
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Rather than walk to the fence and open the gate, it's always more interesting to create an elaborate Rube Goldberg system using bowling balls, balloons, a live chicken (where did that come from?), its egg, sprinklers, and a football. I guess his parents let him do all that. ~ agentdc7
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The Superman "S" actually stands for Sloth. ~ agentdc7
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It's always a good idea to approach an abandoned resturant that has it's lights on, and demand service. ~ Bassmint Stile
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That well buckets weigh just as much as a teenage girl. ~ blinghurst
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Sloth is Superman. ~ Dominic
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Dynamite is not the best item to use as a candle. ~ slashnroses
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Falling down a hill on a bike after being driven off the road by a speeding vehicle won't lead to any lasting damage or injuries. ~ NateSean
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The only thing in Chunk's attic is Hannkuh decorations. ~ NateSean
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Frodo never asked Sam to do a Samwise shuffle. ~ NateSean
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If it doesn't work we'll all "B-flat". ~ NateSean
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Water is wet ain't it? SO DRINK IT!!! ~ agentdc7
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Being teased with a Ruth, Ruth, Baby Ruth will cause you to have super strength. ~ agentdc7
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Jocks are so stupid they can't tell the difference in weight of a sports jacket to an actual girl. ~ agentdc7
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Drug dealers wouldn't be caught dead in those polyester rags. ~ agentdc7
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It's good enough for me. ~ NateSean
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The kids cleaned him out right before they ate him. ~ Optimus Thunder
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After you slip on the log and rack yourself, water will suddenly rise and wash you away. ~ Optimus Thunder
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If God designed our penises upside down, we would all be pissing in each others faces. ~ agentdc7
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Isn't that cute, the boy's want to go to the men's room. ~ NateSean
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Troy wants his Daddy. ~ NateSean
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Be on the lookout for ORV's with "bullet holes the size of matzo balls"! ~ NateSean
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That Chunk doesn't got it. ~ blinghurst
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The pirate who escaped can lift 500 ton boulders and suspend them from chains. ~ Optimus Thunder
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Taking the water shoot that launches you from the highest point is probably the most fun. ~ Optimus Thunder
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After you save the girl you love from drowning, don't untie her hands, put them around your neck. ~ Optimus Thunder
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Sloth loves Chunk when he's on his knees and between his legs. ~ agentdc7
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Data's tired of falling down holes! ~ Sethro
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Historically speaking, One-Eyed Willy was the first Goonie. ~ Sethro
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In 1981, fettucini came in bottles. ~ Deejeezy
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There are some places in the world whose bathrooms you may want to stay away from because they may have daddy long legs in them. ~ Deejeezy
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Making someone fall off a cliff by holding their hand while driving your car and they're on their bike won't result in that person's death or land you in jail. ~ Deejeezy
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The best way to escape during a police car chase is to find the nearest neighborhood off-road race. ~ Deejeezy
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