#1

An electric fence that's powerful enough to repell a dinosaur won't have any lasting effects on an 8 year-old boy. ~ NateSean
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#2

New cow-lowering harnesses must be ordered every time the raptors are fed. ~ Zak
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#3

Regular zoos with elephants and lions have giant trenches and fences to keep the animals in. Jurassic zoos with giant predators need no such precautions. After all, what are the odds that the fences would ever shut off? ~ MusicManD
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#4

Barbasol makes secret dinosaur embryo containers. ~ Zak
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#5

Where do they keep all the cows and goats and why don’t you see them running around the island when the power goes? Is it possible that they were more securely kept than the dinosaurs? ~ LonelyShadow
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#6

When a raptor looks at you, you can tell she's working things out. ~ avalanche719
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#7

It's a good idea to build a bathroom next to the T-rex tour just in case you're scared shitless! ~ thugz4real
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#8

Getting sneezed on by an animal that hasn't been alive for millions of years won't cause any long term illnesses. ~ NateSean
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#9

Someone in a Costa Rican resurant just had a bite of Gillette-cream pie. ~ Lena
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correction: Barbasol ~ username

#10

He may stomp around a bit normally, but when raptors are around, T-Rex is a ninja. ~ MusicManD
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#11

Stopping to say "clever girl" is not a good survival strategy. ~ no
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#12

Fully equip a car to make it look drivable when its just automated. ~ avalanche719
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#13

Raptors will eat everything except the arm, raptors hate arms. ~ avalanche719
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#14

If its heavy, its expensive. ~ avalanche719
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#15

Remember the next time a mosquito bites you: you could be genetically remade in a couple of million years ~ matthijstieleman
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#16

Blueprints make it very hard to find the power box, but once you're there, they provide very detailed descriptions of the primer handle. ~ MusicManD
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#17

Never, ever, turn off the electric fences in a dinosaur amusement park. ~ ekedolphin
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#18

Simply replicating extinct animals and plant life without any idea of how they'll function together in a complex ecosystem is just begging for things to go wrong. ~ ekedolphin
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#19

Comparing your dinosaur amusement park to Disneyworld is not a good idea, mainly because the pirates of the carribbean don't eat the tourists. ~ tenshi
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#20

That is one big pile of shit. ~ avalanche719
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She will remember to wash her hands before she eats anything. ~ skippkipp
win ~ djMADsKiLLz

#21

There isn't a "select all" button on the junction box. ~ avalanche719
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#22

I want tasers on full charge. Not half charge, not quarter charge, FULL charge. ~ avalanche719
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#23

Don't cross your fingers, hold on to your butts. ~ avalanche719
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#24

Dinosaurs are extict because they didn't know how to play fetch. ~ avalanche719
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#25

We've got Dodgson here! ~ avalanche719
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Nice hat. What are you trying to look like, a secret agent? ~ skippkipp
lol i made a whole vid on youtube based on that line. (username on youtube is "thugz4real") ~ thugz4real
Haha. Well played, avalanche and eke' alike. ~ SomeGuy
Nobody cares. ;) ~ ekedolphin

#26

Muldoon gets the gun, Ellie just gets a walkie talkie. Even though she just briefly lectured Hammond about equality. ~ avalanche719
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#27

When you're told to turn the flashlight off, TURN THE DAMN FLASHLIGHT OFF! ~ KungFuMasterLarry
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#28

"Pleeease!", is no longer the magic word. ~ Ally
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#29

If your jello starts wobbling like crazy then it's time to RUN! ~ thugz4real
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#30

Flimsy Foam ceiling tiles are strong enough to support four people's weight as they are frantically trying to escape. ~ thugz4real
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#31

Petrified mosquitoes are not rare at all and were present in all stages of dinosaur history. ~ MusicManD
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And in large enough quantities that they could clone entire herds of dinosaurs no less. ~ NateSean

#32

When you've created an island full of the world's most deadly creatures, never destroy the island with bombs or napalm or anything. Instead, just fly away and let it work itself out. It's better for the sequel that way. ~ MusicManD
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They used napalm at the end of the book though ~ Jbm

#33

The best way to handle priceless, delicate eggs is with a mechanized metal claw. ~ no
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#34

Life finds a way. ~ ekedolphin
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#35

If every school has a fire escape plan, but velociraptors can spread faster than fire AND open doors, then shouldn't every school have a velociraptor escape plan? ~ antonia dinozo
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Oh, God. You wouldn't happen to read XKCD, would you? ~ ekedolphin

#36

No matter what happens, women will inherit the earth! ~ tenshi
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#37

Make sure you wash your hands before you eat after rummaging through dino poop. ~ avalanche719
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#38

Hackers don't like to be called computer nerds. ~ avalanche719
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#39

A raptor is often confused with six foot turkeys ~ avalanche719
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That will make for a nice Thanksgiving feast! ~ UsernameTed

#40

Take a few seconds to compliment a raptor's intelligence before trying to shoot. ~ avalanche719
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#41

A blind dinosaur is actually called a do-you-think-he-saurus. ~ avalanche719
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#42

Nedry is never going to get new glasses. ~ avalanche719
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LOL, true, that ~ Lena

#43

Grant didn't stay up all night like he said he would. Liar. ~ avalanche719
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#44

Don't get mad at Hammond for going to into your trailer, get mad at him for opening your champagne. ~ avalanche719
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#45

Keep the windows up when driving past the diloposaurus enclosure. ~ avalanche719
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#46

Tying a seat belt together works just as well as when you click it together properly. ~ avalanche719
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Dr. Grant had two female buckles,yet he found a way to make it work. It foreshadows how the dinosaurs later start breeding despite the fact that they were all engineered to be female. ~ username

#47

They should've listened to Muldoon when he repeatedly told them that they needed locking mechanisms on the doors. ~ avalanche719
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#48

Instead of extending the stock on your shotgun when you spot your target, extend it when you first acquire it. ~ avalanche719
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#49

Like Jerry Seinfeld, dinosaurs don�t care for Neman either. ~ ml1313
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#50

Even in the midst of chaos by dinosaurs engineered by your own hand, there's always time for ice cream. ~ KungFuMasterLarry
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#51

No one could have predicted that Dr. Grant would suddenly jump out of a moving car. ~ thugz4real
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#52

Eventually there WILL be dinosaurs on the dinosaur tour! ~ thugz4real
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#53

If your Mexican worker is being dragged into the raptor cage and you tell the other Mexican workers to "shoot her," no one will listen. ~ thugz4real
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#54

When designing the roads for your resort theme park island, make sure there is at least one high voltage gate between your visitor's center and the dock. Otherwise, all the people might escape. ~ MusicManD
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#55

When choosing your kitchen decor, remember to always choose stainless. If a hungry dino chases you in, it may one day save your life! ~ MusicManD
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#56

Hammond loves his grandkids. Sure, he doesn't bother going out to the restaurant or the kitchen to check on them after their harrowing adventure, but hey, he loves his grandkids. ~ MusicManD
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#57

Mixing dinosaur DNA with frog DNA never results in strange dino/frog hybrids. ~ MusicManD
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#58

I bet the unimportant doors have manual locks. ~ MusicManD
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#59

When choosing frog DNA to incorporate into your dinosaurs, don't use the regular run-of-the-mill frogs. Spare no expense and get the fancy West African frogs. ~ MusicManD
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#60

When a T-rex is likely to go after you, hide in the bathroom. That'll work. ~ ekedolphin
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When you've got to go you've GOT TO GO! ~ UsernameTed

#61

T-rexes can't see you if you don't move. ~ ekedolphin
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#62

Raptors can open doors. ~ ekedolphin
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#63

The T-rex will only show up at a dramatically appropriate moment. ~ NateSean
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#64

If a dinosaur is completely harmless, that doesn't exclude being able to sneeze all over you. ~ agentdc7
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#65

You'll hate trees after being stuck in one. ~ avalanche719
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#66

The T-Rex wants to hunt not be fed. But it will enjoy the meal when it thinks no one is watching. ~ avalanche719
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#67

Jurassic park must buy harnesses in bulk, since they're destroyed everytime they feed the raptors. ~ avalanche719
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#68

Nobody wants Nedry to pick them up a snack, they know he'll just eat it. ~ avalanche719
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#69

The raptor fences are the only concern to Muldoon. He doesn't care about the Rex or the diloposaurases. ~ avalanche719
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#70

After almost getting crushed by a vehicle, crack a joke about how you were just in there. ~ avalanche719
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#71

Don't be scared of the T-Rex, admire all the blood it extracts from another dinosaur. ~ avalanche719
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#72

Jurassic Park should consider making a chase by a T-Rex apart of its tour. ~ avalanche719
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#73

Who knew that If you �Spared no Expense� in building your multi-billion dollar live dinosaur theme park, that contracting with the guy who bid the lowest for the design of the critical computer system that runs it all would be a bad idea. ~ ml1313
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#74

Why breed the damn raptors in the first place if they're not even part of the tour?! ~ ekedolphin
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#75

When all the fences in a dinosaur amusement park fail, only care if the Raptor cage is still online. ~ thugz4real
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#76

If you see two big wooden doors, assume king-kong is in there. ~ thugz4real
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#77

Always send the black guy to go turn the electricity back on. ~ thugz4real
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#78

Dinosaurs became extinct because they wouldn't play fetch with the stick. ~ thugz4real
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#79

Manual door locks are overrated. What are the odds that the electricity would ever go out? ~ MusicManD
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#80

It's okay to leave two kids alone in a dining room while dinosaurs are on the loose. ~ Ccard
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#81

A T-Rex has an odd gait: as long as it is out of sight it only places a foot on the ground every few seconds or so, thus making your jello wobble. I guess it holds the other one in the air in the mean time. They run like heck when visible, though. ~ no
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#82

Young girls can work with complex computer programs they have never seen because - you know - they refer to themselves as hackers. Flash lights though? Way too complicated. ~ no
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#83

Impact tremors fairly alarm Dr. Ian Malcolm. ~ Kikkomannrice
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#84

Ancient fossilized Raptor talons become valueless to a paleontologist who has been attacked by dinosaurs. ~ Kikkomannrice
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#85

Do not wipe the water out of your eyes when a T-Rex is standing in front of you. ~ avalanche719
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#86

Wipe the shaving cream off on a piece of pie, not a napkin or anything. ~ avalanche719
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#87

Carry a compass because park signs are not always accurate. ~ avalanche719
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#88

Malcolm carries on conversations even when he is alone. ~ avalanche719
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#89

Forget the schematics, just follow the pipes. ~ avalanche719
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#90

Count before you run. ~ avalanche719
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#91

You're still alive when raptors start to eat you. ~ avalanche719
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#92

Raptors are good at distracting people until other Raptors can flank said person. ~ avalanche719
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Raptors rock. ~ NateSean
Raptors rock. ~ NateSean

#93

Remember to stop after tossing the flare. ~ avalanche719
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#94

If you beat Lex at something, the only reward is respect. ~ avalanche719
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#95

T-Rexes think tires and autoparts are delicious. ~ avalanche719
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#96

Mr. Arnold must've let go of his butt in favor of a pipe when the raptor attacked. ~ avalanche719
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#97

If your big production gets lots of people killed, not only will your business be okay, so will you! No repercussion. No worries. ~ ThunderRollin
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There's a deleted board room scene from The Lost World in which it is revealed that the family members of those who were killed on Isla Nublar are suing InGen and that InGen's stock is dropping. The executives then vote to remove Hammond from the office of CEO. ~ username
I agree. Hammond in the book was an idiot. I was actually kind of glad to see him get eaten by Compys. ~ NateSean
Hammond got off much easier in the movie than he did in the book. By a long shot. It bothers me greatly. ~ ThunderRollin

#98

Where did the drop off come from??? Where did T-Rex's paddock go??? ~ ThunderRollin
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Other side of the road. ~ MusicManD

#99

Raptors are easily fooled by reflections. ~ Zak
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#100

Public Bathrooms are the worst place to hide from a T-rex. You'll just end up getting eaten off the toilet! ~ thugz4real
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#101

Hey! When you gotta go you gotta go! ~ thugz4real
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#102

Malcolm hates being right all the time. ~ thugz4real
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#103

Hammond really hates Malcolm. ~ thugz4real
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#104

Don't worry, Dennis can afford new glasses! ~ thugz4real
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#105

Most dinosaur hunters have British accents for some reason ~ matthijstieleman
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#106

Paleontologists don't mind that the park is named after just one period in paleontology even though there are dinosaurs present that never lived in the Jurassic period. ~ matthijstieleman
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#107

When you're in the middle of a tropical storm, drive way too fast. ~ matthijstieleman
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#108

Macintosh computers are noted for their reliability, however for dinosaur park purposes they should not be used. ~ matthijstieleman
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#109

Velociraptors will inturrupt your dessert pig-out, especially if you're eating Jell-O. ~ Lena
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#110

Velociraptors speak Wookie. ~ MusicManD
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#111

Unix looks like a video game. ~ MusicManD
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#112

After they finalize the "T-Rex Chase" ride, Jurassic Park really needs to consider the "Spin Around on the Dinosaur Bones" ride. ~ MusicManD
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#113

Defense systems and door locks may be up, but nothing keeps T-Rex out. Nothing. ~ MusicManD
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#114

Objects/T-rexes in the Mirror Are Closer Than They Appear ~ Monkey Overlord
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#115

Where DID that goat come from? ~ LonelyShadow
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#116

Fake electrocutions are not funny. ~ Ccard
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#117

Ok let's make public a place where you have the most dangerous predator of millions years ago. It will funny ~ 0zkr
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#118

A 12 year old with UNIX experience is handy to have around if the power goes out. ~ djMADsKiLLz
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#119

Guests don't need to wear protective gear like the workers when tampering with newborn genetic products. ~ nee
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#120

When sneaking sensitive biotechnology out of a computer-guarded installation, it helps to have a plan B in case the island you're on suffers a typhoon. Like, perhaps, waiting a few days. ~ ekedolphin
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#121

Just because you can do something, doesn't mean you should. ~ ekedolphin
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#122

Although it's nessecary to wash your hands after handling contemporary reptiles there won't be any such precautions handling newly cloned ones. ~ NateSean
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#123

Eight year olds love reading huge books. ~ avalanche719
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#124

Go ahead and invite kids you just met to a bbq. ~ avalanche719
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#125

Don't bother extending the stock on your shotgun, you're going to die anyway. ~ avalanche719
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#126

Dennis has butterfingers. ~ avalanche719
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#127

T-Rex saves the day! ~ avalanche719
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#128

You have to respect the power! ~ avalanche719
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#129

Malcolm is only occasionally married and expects all relationships to fail before they start. ~ avalanche719
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#130

Hammond spared no expenses. ~ avalanche719
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#131

Raptors are lethal at eight months. ~ avalanche719
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#132

Impact tremors are a fairly alarming. ~ avalanche719
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#133

Must go faster! ~ avalanche719
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#134

Nobody could've predicted that Dr Grant would jump out of a moving vehicle. ~ avalanche719
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#135

The only one on Hammond's side is the bloodsucking lawyer. ~ avalanche719
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#136

Sucks to be the gatekeeper. ~ avalanche719
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#137

A raptor hissing in a cage will still scare the workers. ~ avalanche719
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#138

Malcolm thinks dinosaurs wear skirts. ~ avalanche719
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#139

They must've paid Muldoon a hefty salary to keep him on when he thinks they should all be destroyed. ~ avalanche719
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#140

Hammond won't blame you for a mistake, but he'll make you pay for it. ~ avalanche719
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#141

After learning about dinosaurs the whole tour, you'll think you're going to see King Kong. ~ avalanche719
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#142

After eating something salty, Nedry wants something sweet. ~ avalanche719
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#143

The T-Rex doesn't like bone statues of itself. ~ avalanche719
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#144

Stay away from the trees bordering an open field, the T-Rex may be hiding there. ~ avalanche719
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#145

Make sure the passenger door is locked before you get out of the jeep. ~ avalanche719
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#146

When everyone else is evacuating the island, maybe you should too. ~ avalanche719
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#147

Shoot her! ~ avalanche719
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#148

Malcolm thinks there's gonna be a T-rex chasing a jeep on the tour. ~ thugz4real
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#149

Hammond spared no expenses yet they didn't think of arming the park with bigger guns than simple shotguns so that IF the dinosaurs got pissed, they would have something to kill them with. ~ matthijstieleman
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According to the book, Hammond didn't want his expensive attractions to be harmed and resisted having any weapons on the island. When Muldoon threatened to quit and expose InGen's lack of concern for safety to the press, InGen allowed for two laser-guided missile launchers to be kept in a locked room for which only Muldoon had keys. ~ username