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Youth in Revolt

Last Updated
01/10/10
Started By
Adam
Entries
50
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the top 100

#1

The going rate for a trailer park dog is a subway card that has four stickers on it. ~ Adam
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    #2

    If you're 48, have a kid, no money, and stretch marks, the best you can hope for is Zack Galifianakis. ~ Adam
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    #3

    Lawyers build second floors to look down on the world. ~ Adam
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      #4

      Lawyers speak only in legal jargon. ~ Adam
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        #5

        Having the same last name as a badass gangster is more attractive to women than your real last name. ~ Adam
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        #6

        The girl who lets you straddle her and put lotion all over her body certainly has a boyfriend. ~ Adam
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          #7

          If you have an incredibly private journal, always leave it unattended next to the girl whose name fills many of its pages. ~ Adam
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            #8

            The gasoline knows you did it. ~ Adam
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              #9

              If you're walking around a school campus where everyone's only allowed to speak French, don't enlist your French-speaking friend to ask questions on your behalf. ~ Adam
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                #10

                Robert Frost went by the nickname Bobby. ~ Adam
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                  #11

                  There are two ways to tickle a belly button. ~ Adam
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                    #12

                    Fixing your penis makes sense even if you don't have a chance with the girl who you're in love with. ~ Adam
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                      #13

                      The best people to rip off are three strapping young Navy sailors. ~ Adam
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                        #14

                        Owls are perverts. ~ Adam
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                          #15

                          Water droplets fall slower when you're in love. ~ Adam
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                            #16

                            Just because you're an expert in film doesn't mean you know who directed your favorite movie. ~ Adam
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                              #17

                              Always name your imaginary future husbands. ~ Adam
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                                #18

                                If you're going to sleep on the floor next to your friend, always take off your shirt. ~ Adam
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                                  #19

                                  Police officer lovers can always think of "some way" you can repay you. ~ Adam
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                                    #20

                                    Bernice Lynch is a very pretty name. ~ Adam
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                                      #21

                                      If you take your shirt off once for solidarity, you'll never need to put it back on again. ~ Adam
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                                        #22

                                        Police who barge into your house looking for an important suspect will take the time to call you out on your illegal satellite hookup. ~ Adam
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                                          #23

                                          A car that hurtles off a cliff into a shallow river will land safely with minimal damage. ~ Adam
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                                            #24

                                            Michael Cera has an easily identifiable and unique physical description. ~ Adam
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                                              #25

                                              Always know the expected punishment before taking drastic escape measures from the police. ~ Adam
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                                                #26

                                                Lawyers live in trailer parks. ~ adubz
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                                                  #27

                                                  A person can work for a wood magazine even if they do not know a thing about it. ~ kittykat
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                                                    #28

                                                    Giving a strict and religious parents mushrooms is the only way to see your girl again. ~ kittykat
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                                                      #29

                                                      Help is granted when you call a person that likes illegal immigrants. ~ kittykat
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                                                        #30

                                                        Apparently Justin Long is the only man capable of pulling a beautiful woman away from Steve Buscemi ~ EssMess
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                                                          #31

                                                          Fred Willard can't handle 'shrooms. ~ EssMess
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                                                            #32

                                                            Portia Doubleday is a crown. ~ EssMess
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                                                              #33

                                                              Be sure to remove all remnants of banana from your transmission before selling your car to a sailor. ~ EssMess
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                                                                #34

                                                                Who needs porn when you have good 'shrooms? ~ EssMess
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                                                                  #35

                                                                  Creating an alternative and foreign persona that encourages you to be bad is the best way to win over any girl. ~ HermanoBluth
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                                                                    #36

                                                                    You won't get Portia Doubleday by listening to records. ~ jawson44
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                                                                    #37

                                                                    When you rat out your sister and her boyfriend, she won't stop playing Ashley Simpson. ~ jawson44
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                                                                      #38

                                                                      After you loose your virginity, you're going to jail. ~ kaizar
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                                                                        #39

                                                                        A moustache is irresistible to women. ~ luckylittlerhino
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                                                                          #40

                                                                          DVD cases make excellent tampons. ~ Adam
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                                                                            #41

                                                                            Use a scornful school girl as a partner in crime. ~ kittykat
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                                                                              #42

                                                                              Going crazy makes you cooler ~ EssMess
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                                                                                #43

                                                                                Be sure to get out all your revolting while still a juvenile. ~ EssMess
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                                                                                  #44

                                                                                  There are two sides to Michael Cera. ~ HermanoBluth
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                                                                                    #45

                                                                                    We get it Michael Cera. You are unable to act as anybody else but yourself. ~ daveyboy189
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                                                                                      #46

                                                                                      Saying dirty words before you bone your girlfriend in an all-girl-dormitory, of which the landlady does not know of your unconsented sleepover, is not a good idea... especially if those words are the idea of your alter ego... ~ kaizar
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                                                                                        #47

                                                                                        Trent and his adorable sweater will not move without a fight. ~ ryan corderman
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                                                                                          #48

                                                                                          You should depend on child support to support your child. ~ ryan corderman
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                                                                                            #49

                                                                                            Francois isn't leaving until you stick your dick in this filthy tomato. ~ ryan corderman
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                                                                                              #50

                                                                                              When you need to make up a girlfriend always describe her in very specific and unrealistic ways "Her name is Martha Singwal, she's 16... she's got toasted almond hair, so... she's only just recently returned from Nice where she's been conducting sociological research on the assimilation problems of Italian immigrants... workers... down there. She's also a professional model, specializes in lingerie. She likes me quite a bit, she tells me that she likes my hair... " trust me it only makes you sound more desirable! ~ ryan corderman
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