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In Moscow, you can catch a ride on a nuclear submarine as easily as catching a cab. ~ oleza
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Light bulbs only glow in the dark. They are completely effectless in daylight. ~ Dora11740
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When experiencing an electrical anomaly, police can always rely on their clubs to probe things. ~ oleza
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If you must engage in battle with microwave aliens, always ride horses since they don't run on batteries or internal combustion engines. They're invulnerable to electromagnetic pulses. ~ oleza
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Did they just leave the cat behind? ~ Dora11740
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Civilians are allowed to hang out in the operations room on a nuclear submarine, because they are useful in strategic planning. ~ bourbonphantom
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If you fall into the water with a bunch of lethal voltage capacitors slung on your back, it's no big deal. The laws of physics actually take a lunch break here. ~ bourbonphantom
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Small glass bulbs do not shatter when you throw them on a concrete floor. ~ bourbonphantom
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Locked in a store room for 4 days and nobody has to poop the whole time. ~ bourbonphantom
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The aliens can be killed by pieces of their own armor. ~ bourbonphantom
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The aliens are able to float unless presented with a choice between molotov cocktails and a puddle of water. ~ bourbonphantom
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A microwave gun will continue to work after being submerged in salt water with just a few tweaks here and there! ~ TiffYG2133
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Cats are far less important to the plot and far more useless because nobody cared about it when aliens invaded the building they were in. ~ Movie Genius
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If you have a good idea for an alien invasion movie but are too cheap for state of the art CGI aliens, just make them invisible. ~ yeahright
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When an alien goes after you, you hide behind a glass table instead of running to safety. ~ Filmguy
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Annoying Russian business men know how to handle machine guns. ~ Filmguy
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Instead of just popping the trunk of the car with the release, get the tire jack that is inexplicably in the car rather than the trunk to dramatically yet unconvincingly drag out a scene. ~ Reads
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You can always count on a local electrician to create an effective weapon to use against alien invaders. ~ oleza
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When traveling abroad, don't bother carrying any books that will help you communicate with the locals. Charades is much more fun. ~ oleza
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If you ever need a fellow American to chat with, you can find one in any club around the world. ~ oleza
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Chainmail armor made out of keys is awesome and effective! ~ oleza
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An invasion by microwave aliens is much cleaner than a zombie apocalypse. ~ oleza
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What holidays are they surviving? The one's this year, or the one's last year that just happened. ~ jermanyx
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Russians have stockpiles of hurricane fencing lying around for easy transport. They're also really light weight and one person could lug many of them up 20 flights of stairs. ~ bourbonphantom
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It is quicker to dig far into the earth for conductive metals than to just harvest the various cars, electronic devices, streetlights, air conditioners, etc. that have been conveniently left on the surface of the planet. ~ bourbonphantom
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For being super advanced, the aliens don't seem to know when they are giving themselves away. ~ bourbonphantom
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Glass is an insulator, but a leather jacket is not. ~ bourbonphantom
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In Russia, the definition of Faraday Cage is much more forgiving. ~ bourbonphantom
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There are no convenient store rooms in the US Embassy for people to lock themselves away in. ~ bourbonphantom
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No matter what the global crisis is, Americans are in charge. ~ bourbonphantom
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Shoes are difficult to disintegrate. ~ bourbonphantom
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Submarines carry a stockpile of replacement cell phone batteries. ~ bourbonphantom
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An EMP blast only destroys batteries. ~ bourbonphantom
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You're extremely traumatised after seeing your friend vaporised, but after a couple of days you've already forgotten about it. ~ Movie Genius
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