Vampires, while easily killed by werewolves and other vampires, have not figured out how to kill themselves without traveling to another country and going through an elaborate judicial process. ~ Adam
Rating: 40 (+43/-3) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)
Werewolves, by definition, must have six pack abs and take every possible opportunity to show them off, even if it means standing in the rain topless waiting for someone to randomly stop by. ~ Adam
Rating: 40 (+43/-3) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (7)
So if a vampire sparkles in the sunlight...it brings a whole new meaning to the lyric "I wanna take a ride on your disco stick." ~ antonia dinozo
Rating: 34 (+35/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (4)
There are man-eating “bears” in your area, and your boyfriend and best friend have left you. Go hiking. ~ Wayward Warrior
Rating: 33 (+34/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (4)
Werewolf First Aid Guide-Motorcycle Wrecks.
Step one- Remove shirt.
~ Blank of BBS
Rating: 29 (+30/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (3)
If a werewolf in wolf form sees a girl jump off a cliff, it will transform back into human form and take a break to put on clothes before leaping into the water to save her. ~ Adam
Rating: 23 (+27/-4) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)
When you're a vampire and protecting your girlfriend from your newest family member, you have to fling her across the room and into a glass table to protect her. ~ Sharkboy
Rating: 22 (+22/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (4)
Someone who is 100 years older, smarter, and more mature always falls for some teenage girl ravaged by hormones and lack of experience in life. ~ tsukasaluver
Rating: 21 (+22/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)
"I LIKE WATCHING YOU SLEEP," is not creepy. ~ umm
Rating: 21 (+22/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (4)
A pasty, lanky, 108 year old virgin prone to abandonment is preferable to being surrounded by well-built, tanned, 17 year old guys that stand shirtless in the rain for kicks and grins. ~ Raindrop23
Rating: 20 (+20/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (3)
All teenage girls secretly long to be caught between two violent and unpredictable men. ~ Raiha
Rating: 18 (+19/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)
Suicide is the ultimate form of “I love you.” ~ Wayward Warrior
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When transforming into a werewolf, remove your shirt so it won't get ripped apart. Don't worry about the pants though: they will stay intact and magically reapear once you transform back. ~ SainaTsukino
Rating: 18 (+18/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)
Vampires aren't allowed to kill in a way that will attract a lot of human attention, unless it involves killing entire groups of tourist at once. ~ Adam
Rating: 15 (+18/-3) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (3)
Body glitter is officially in again. ~ Z
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The first step to tending to anyone who has been injured is to take off your shirt. ~ Kaytea
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A guy who looks like he got in a fight with body glitter definitely screams DANGER TO YOUR HEALTH. ~ MaRona
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The best answer to getting dumped is to sit in the same spot and position for 3 months and refuse to bathe. ~ Raindrop23
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Werewolves are absolutely forbidden to tell humans about their existence. They are, however, allowed to HINT that they're werewolves in a manner that's not unlike a guessing game. ~ Adam
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It's okay to fall for guys who sparkle, they aren't always gay. ~ Shauna
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The best message you can possibly send to hundreds of thousands of preteen girls is that climbing on the back of a motorcycle with a random guy who looks an awful lot like a rapist is a positive thing. ~ osakapower
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That creepy biker guy whose Harley you just jumped on the back of? Yeah, he’s just going to let you off at your earliest convenience. ~ Wayward Warrior
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When planning a surprise birthday for your human girlfriend, make sure to invite the recently-turned vampire with self-control issues. ~ Adam
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A movie titled "Face Punch" will have nothing but gunshot sound effects. ~ Adam
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Mortals are, by default, comedic relief. ~ Wayward Warrior
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Italians do it better. ~ Wayward Warrior
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If a girl slaps you, it’s okay to transform into a beast and try to bite her head off. Literally. ~ Wayward Warrior
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Vampires enjoy skipping through the forest. ~ Raindrop23
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There are no men's shirt stores in Forks, Washington. ~ Ace
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Just because the werewolf is in human form, doesn't mean you aren't a Furry. ~ neko nana mode
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No one can ever use the metaphor of twilight again. THANKS! ~ tsukasaluver
Rating: 12 (+12/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (9)
The most effective way for a vampire to commit suicide is not using a stake, but going to a faraway country to suicide by sparkle. ~ SainaTsukino
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When a misunderstanding over the phone occurs, don't press "dial back" but run to the last known location of the caller. ~ SainaTsukino
Rating: 12 (+15/-3) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)
Just because she'll die for you doesn't mean she'll marry you. ~ WatcherAngel
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While vacationing at Volterra, Italy, do not accept any tours or enter strange buildings. ~ redabyssdistroyerkie
Rating: 11 (+12/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)
If your boyfriend dumps you, you will scream uninterruptedly at night for three months and your father will only be moderately annoyed. ~ Loli Pop
Rating: 11 (+12/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)
Edward's mind-reading ability would be of great use to the Volturi, even though they have someone with Edward's exact power, only much magnified. ~ Adam
Rating: 10 (+15/-5) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (6)
When your boyfriend dumps you, just take completely out-of-character, death-defying risks until he's forced to save you. Emotional blackmail works every time! ~ Bagheera
Rating: 10 (+14/-4) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)
If you're a wise old man who knows all about mythology and whose son is a werewolf himself, don't seek refuge if you sense a vampire is near; instead, try to hunt her with your big, unwieldy shotgun. ~ Adam
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Female werewolves rarely (never) rip off their clothes. And that is a great disappointment. ~ MokonaYi
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Love spelled backwards is "love" - not "evol." ~ Adam
Rating: 9 (+13/-4) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)
It's better to leave someone alone and defenseless against immortal beings trying to kill them than it is to stay with them and possibly cause a few bruises or papercuts. ~ Adam
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Cops are always the last to know. ~ Wayward Warrior
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They'll let any old riff raff into public schools. ~ Adam
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When in doubt, take your shirt off. It doesn't matter if you don't have abs, they can be airbrushed on. ~ Waffuru
Rating: 8 (+10/-2) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (3)
You don't need a passport to go to Italy. ~ SainaTsukino
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To be viewed as a food source is the ultimate form of loooove!! ~ umm
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If a town is named after silverware that could possibly kill you, beware. ~ NanaNekoz
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Being in an elevater with five vampires and stuck listening to opera on the way down is...awkward. ~ Jyanchan
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Getting a tattoo is worth being scolded over; attempting to nearly kill yourself in order to hallucinate is peachy keen. ~ Wayward Warrior
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You’ve never been to my city before? No worries. The urgency of your situation is totally the best navigation system. ~ Wayward Warrior
Rating: 7 (+9/-2) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)
Girls would rather cuddle with cold stone than a warm wolf. ~ Sage of Magic
Rating: 7 (+8/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)
Doing dangerous things, like jumping off a cliff, riding a machine you know nothing about, and walking towards creepy people, just to hear your loved one's voice is never symbolism for suicide attempts. ~ Shadow Vampiress
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I learned...nothing. ~ hisaishi
Rating: 7 (+9/-2) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)
Only one minor character in an entire family of vampires who supposedly love you very much will raise any concerns whatsoever about you deciding to become a soulless, undead vampire forever. ~ Adam
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You can fall off a motorcycle that is skidding sideways and only get a few cuts, without bleeding, but when you get a paper cut you bleed all over yourself. ~ Shauna
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When you look at vampires through a werewolf's eyes, they look a lot more dead. ~ Shauna
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All that glitters is not gold. ~ Adam
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A papercut can almost get you killed if you're surronded by vamps, but, hum, "womanly problems" go unnoticed. ~ SainaTsukino
Rating: 7 (+8/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (4)
The hardest decision a teenage girl can make is whether she wants to date the guy who wants to kill her or the one that drinks out of the toilet. ~ wolfgirl92
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the choice between necrophilia and beastiality is tough for a teenager.... ~ theattack
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On-screen violence aggravates flu-like symptoms and induces vomiting. ~ Wayward Warrior
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Don't worry. Acting like he's ready to eat you is just another way of saying he loves you. ~ Z
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You have to fall for a man who comes up to you and says, "I'm bad for you" But can't fall for your best friend who is trying to protect you from the bad. ~ Shauna
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If you move up to Forks, Washington you never have to actually attend school if your dad is the town doctor. Everyone is just okay with you being gone for weeks at a time without question. ~ Shauna
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If you eat animals you're a vegetarian vampire, but if you eat people you automatically become a monster. What if you eat both, does that make you an omni-vore? ~ Shauna
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Sickly pale is the new tan. ~ Wayward Warrior
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It doesn't matter whether the movie is terrible or not, because at least 30% of girls going to see it are only there to see a shirtless hottie. ~ Melodicanth
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Zombie movies are metaphors for leprosy and consumerism. ~ Adam
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If your boyfriend gets controlled by a brooding alpha werewolf who stared at him menacingly for half the movie, the worst you can expect is that he'll get a haircut and maybe a tattoo. ~ Adam
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Using the "jump off a tall place" trick from the old Superman movie does NOT work for vampires. ~ Adam
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Papercuts attract vampires. ~ Shauna
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Vampires are perfectly okay with Grand Theft Auto, if the car is pretty enough. ~ Shauna
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You're cooler than Elvis if you can walk in slow mo'. ~ Pleiades Rising
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If you forget to mention a main character's "special ability" in the first movie that will come into play in the third movie, make sure you mention it in that character's first scene. ~ Invaderben
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If no mind-reader can read your mind, it does NOT mean your mind is blank. nuh-huh. ~ SainaTsukino
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When you leave your significant other, the best place to angst is an attic in South America. ~ Waffuru
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Hallucinations of the guy who dumped you are NOT a good reason to stop riding your motorcycle. ~ Blank of BBS
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Paper cuts + vampires= bad. ~ MewChero
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If you're not human, you would rather enter through the window than the door. ~ Shauna
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If someone directly tells you "Don't do anything stupid..." the first thing you are naturally going to do is stupid, or to just sit there and cry. Either way...pretty stupid. ~ Shauna
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If you live with the sherriff of the town you are living in, you are more than likely to have at least three people break into your house, one of them to steal crap. ~ Shauna
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There's nothing wrong with suicide attempts bringing you closer to your beloved. ~ chobi chi
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Werewolves are not hairy. ~ TripleZ
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It's not always good to be a tourist. ~ Wayward Warrior
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A Mary Sue as a main character makes the movie that much more popular for preteen girls ~ SainaTsukino
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Vampire sparkles are rainbow-colored. Like Skittles. ~ Wayward Warrior
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To anyone who is considering jumping off of a highly elevated cliff into a rocky ocean grave for the sole purpose of seeing hallucinations of your sparkly yet abandonment-prone boyfriend: try heroin. ~ vaccuum
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Vampires who are over 100 years old would rather leave town to live with their parents and siblings than stay behind and live on their own with the girl they love. ~ Adam
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Even as a werewolf, your coat is always naturally groomed and never has any defects. ~ Shauna
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If you move to Forks, Washington you will immediately be considered awesome and popular, and be liked by all the boys in the school. ~ Shauna
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A cult effectively stops being just that when you join and realize how different things really are. Uh huh, sure. ~ Wayward Warrior
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Girls in a movie theater will go "oooh" when they see Jacob take his shirt off but in Edward's first shirtless scene one girl will shout, "ick" to the applause of the rest of the theater. (Actually happened when I went to see this. Poor Rob.) ~ NateSean
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Some vampires in past lives were wizards. ~ hisaishi
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Just because a girl is beautiful DOES NOT mean you should follow her everywhere. ~ Shauna
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After your boyfriend comes back from almost killing himself, you have to immediately choose between him and your best friend. ~ Sharkboy
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As a werewolf you are required to either go shirtless or wear a shirt to where it doesn't matter if it's on or not. ~ Shauna
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As a little side note: You should never tell another guy - who may or may not be a werewolf - that you love him right in front of a vampire who can kill you at any second. Especially when you love the vampire too. ~ Alazne Chan
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If you see a fire in the ocean, you are either hallucinating or a crazy vampire, which is after you, is being chased by a bunch of giant wolves. ~ xXdeathnoteluvrzXx
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Nearly dying for the sake of hallucinations is a perfectly logical idea! ~ Koda
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Werewolves don't give off the wet dog smell. ~ Yuki
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Bloody hell, Harry! Cedric Diggory didn't die after all! Take that Voldemort! ~ antonia dinozo
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If vampirism makes one beautiful, explain Marcus. ~ wiinterrr
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Vampires do show up on film. ~ Halfsh0t
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Your boyfriend is more than happy to read a werewolf’s mind for his own benefit and amusement, but when you ask him what said werewolf is thinking and if he’s going to hurt you, all you get is a blank stare. Guess you’re on your own, peaches. ~ SkyolaGrl
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Geeks are ugly, but sickly, pale, 100 year old vampires are considered hot. ~ Wolfie7
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Red cloaks symbolize victory over vampires. ~ Wayward Warrior
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When you're a vampire who is friends with a clumsy human, definitely wrap their gifts, no matter how high the risks of a paper cut are. ~ MewChero
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Your dad won't let you see the one man you care about and have been with for a long time, but he's okay with you going to another town to watch a movie with a girl you barely know, but calls herself your friend. ~ Shauna
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If you are in a love fight between a vampire and a werewolf you are more than likely to have a whole bunch of nightmares if someone is not there for you. ~ Shauna
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Love bites. Haha, get it? ~ Wayward Warrior
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It's okay to use people as a means to an end. ~ Wayward Warrior
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When you've almost been supper for your vampire boyfriend's newly vegetarian brother, it is a good idea to act sexy (read:creepy eyes) and ask for a birthday kiss after the ordeal, thereby making sure your overprotective boyfriend won't do anything rash ... such as require the entire family to lose contact with you for months. ~ Silver
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It's okay to ignore your dad's pal's death to pursue your love and continue ignoring it when you get your love back. ~ blah and more blah
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Middleaged women have no problem showing their lust over Edward shirtless seeing as how he's over a 100 years old. When Jacob removes his shirt they must contain a silent squeee to themselves for fear of being labeled as pedophiles. ~ CowgirlJ
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There's a vampire hunting you, your best friend (a werewolf) is hunting the vampire, and your father is hunting your best friend. What's the best thing you can do? Going to leapt into the water from a cliff. ~ mirabella
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If your vampire boyfriend asks you to take a walk with him after a few days of not speaking to you...heads up, it will not end well. ~ Sassy
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Edward is a slow learner. That's twice he's left Bella alone, thinking she would be safer, only to have someone with a grudge against him attempt to kill her. ~ NateSean
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When you are 108 years old and dating a 17 year old, being a vampire let's you off the hook from pedophilia ~ nuknuk
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The requirements for being the perfect boyfriend: 1) Glittering 2)Having an appetite for the girl's blood 3) Being considerably older than the girl (like 100 years older) 4) Constantly abandoning her 5) Being suicidal 6)Being homicidal 7) Being pedophile 8) Breaking into her room to watch her sleep 9)Having great cars and a big house ~ nuknuk
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Werefols don't know the exact meaning of secret. Case in point: Jacob says "Have you ever had a secret... that you couldn't tell anyone?". Secret = sth that you can't tell anyone, right? ~ nuknuk
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While practically fooling around with your friend's six pack ( who you know loves you), keep talking about how much you love your ex-boyfriend. ~ mannerino
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If you have a vampire as a best friend you either have to have an awesome car, or your car has to have an awesome sound system. ~ Shauna
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There are no ugly vampires. (Personal preferences notwithstanding.) ~ Wayward Warrior
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Vampires are all for oligarchy. ~ Wayward Warrior
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People have been telling Bella to just go jump off a cliff for months now... im glad she finally listened to someone other than herself (oh, and if you start hearing and seeing your ex-boyfriend without him actually being there, that's a good sign that you should start seeing a psycologist). ~ LadyDaralis
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Leprosy isn't funny. ~ irg19
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Watching this movie and talking smack about this movie have nothing to do with one another. The fact that you don't need to know that plot to do that makes it fun! ~ umm
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Werewolves have telepathic abilities. ~ k1ngv1rus
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When being held by the throat from a vampire you will continue to look tough only to suffer a heart attack after the werewolf whose paw print you just erased saves you from her. ~ CowgirlJ
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A newly vegetarian vampire will only use a paper cut as an excuse to attack a teenage girl, when the reality is he did it because she earlier shamed him into shutting his mouth due to her bad feelings of being wished a happy birthday. ~ CowgirlJ
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Even vampires have bad hair days. ~ Halfsh0t
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You can't run with Vampires. They're fast. ~ Halfsh0t
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Old women are still found tastefully sexy in reflections in the middle of a meadow. ~ Shineska
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Poor Jacob thought being shirtless would help her with the decision on who to be with. Sorry Jacob, you did it ten other times in the movie. Just not now. But be on the look out. ~ Shineska
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Edward was just going out for a simple tan he long needed. But no, Bella had to stop him for theatrics. FOR LOVE. ~ Shineska
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When you become a werewolf - you get a tat, a haircut, lose your shirt and are perpetually hot. ~ kerina
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Werewolves can't wait for a full moon. ~ Freeman
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Vampires enjoy elevator music. ~ magpie34
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Scoffing is a perfectly, not at all annoying way to express one self verbally. ~ Sassy
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Going to Italy from Brasil takes 2 days less than going there from USA ~ nuknuk
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Bella has become THE TEASE FROM HELL!!! ~ mannerino
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GET READY FANGIRLS. JACOB IS STILL SINGLE. ~ Shineska
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We've lovingly mined 238 movies for 6713 learnings. New Goal: 10,000 learnings.
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