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The Twilight Saga: New Moon

Last Updated
11/24/09
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Adam
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the top 100

#1

Vampires, while easily killed by werewolves and other vampires, have not figured out how to kill themselves without traveling to another country and going through an elaborate judicial process. ~ Adam
Rating: 40 (+43/-3) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)

  • I can imagine it now Loli! It would be funny! However i don't see why they can't fall off a cliff and stake themselves on pointy rocks. That would be epic! ~ Sharkboy
  • I suggest they try to claw their own hearts out. Dramatic and amusing. ~ Loli Pop

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#2

Werewolves, by definition, must have six pack abs and take every possible opportunity to show them off, even if it means standing in the rain topless waiting for someone to randomly stop by. ~ Adam
Rating: 40 (+43/-3) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (7)

  • I'm agree with TexasGreatGrams, he wasn't just standing under the rain. ~ mirabella
  • Jacob was NOT just walking in the rain, shirtless, waiting for Bella to drop in. He was on the way to meet up with the rest of the wolfpack ~ TexasGreatGrams
  • Almost goes hand in hand with my learning ~ neko nana mode
  • I love how the fangirls were in the audience going "SKWEEEEEE," everytime they saw Jacob topless. Had to be painful on the ears. ~ Blank of BBS
  • Yes! I love this movie law. ~ Loli Pop
  • I agree. This is obvious. ~ wolfgirl92
  • Duh! ~ OuranSweety

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#3

So if a vampire sparkles in the sunlight...it brings a whole new meaning to the lyric "I wanna take a ride on your disco stick." ~ antonia dinozo
Rating: 34 (+35/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (4)

  • Did Lady Gaga had a vampire boyfriend? ~ k1ngv1rus
  • Well i woudn't want to ride that disco stick.... it bites :) ~ Sharkboy
  • Wow....just wow... ~ chobi chi
  • LAWL ~ umm

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#4

There are man-eating “bears” in your area, and your boyfriend and best friend have left you. Go hiking. ~ Wayward Warrior
Rating: 33 (+34/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (4)

  • Sounds like a fun plan to me. XD ~ wolfgirl92
  • Don't forget the apple in your mouth! ~ Grayfire
  • Sounds like it's time for a Gravy Bath. ~ Ace
  • Good plan. Make sure you smell delicious. ~ Loli Pop

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#5

Werewolf First Aid Guide-Motorcycle Wrecks. Step one- Remove shirt. ~ Blank of BBS
Rating: 29 (+30/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (3)

  • Well, it's riddiculus. But when Taylor Laurent is the one who do that ... well I would accept this first aid. ~ mirabella
  • I'll take it! ~ wolfgirl92
  • Wish I got that kind of first aid... Hot shirtless guy would cure me fast! ~ Loli Pop

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#6

If a werewolf in wolf form sees a girl jump off a cliff, it will transform back into human form and take a break to put on clothes before leaping into the water to save her. ~ Adam
Rating: 23 (+27/-4) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)

  • Jacob could not pull her from the water as a wolf-and he is able to control his phasing. This is one of the times he had his shorts tied around his leg. ~ TexasGreatGrams
  • well yeah he didn't want her to die from his abs-of-glory. He was just being considerate! :D ~ Sharkboy

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#7

When you're a vampire and protecting your girlfriend from your newest family member, you have to fling her across the room and into a glass table to protect her. ~ Sharkboy
Rating: 22 (+22/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (4)

  • ha ha ha ha LOL thats the funniest shit eva thks ~ noobkiller2833
  • I love being protected by broken glass! ~ Loli Pop
  • Well thank you! I thought it was clever. ~ Sharkboy
  • This deserves a plus just for the username, but...I suppose their reasoning was good enough as well. ~ Shauna

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#8

Someone who is 100 years older, smarter, and more mature always falls for some teenage girl ravaged by hormones and lack of experience in life. ~ tsukasaluver
Rating: 21 (+22/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)

  • They are "soulmates". And Edward did not want to fall in love with her. ~ TexasGreatGrams
  • Hey, she smells delicious! ~ Grayfire

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#9

"I LIKE WATCHING YOU SLEEP," is not creepy. ~ umm
Rating: 21 (+22/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (4)

  • Shouldn't this one be on the Twilight list? ~ irg19
  • Oh yeah, Edward isn't a stalker! ~ Grayfire
  • It's almost like that weird Jessie McCartney song - "I want you and your beautiful soul." I mean sure...to some people it may be sweet, but to me...sounds kinda demonic..."I want your soul..." I mean...think about that and try to go to sleep at night... ~ Shauna
  • It's almost like that weird Jessie McCartney song - "I want you and your beautiful soul." I mean sure...to some people it may be sweet, but to me...sounds kinda demonic..."I want your soul..." I mean...think about that and try to go to sleep at night... ~ Shauna

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#10

A pasty, lanky, 108 year old virgin prone to abandonment is preferable to being surrounded by well-built, tanned, 17 year old guys that stand shirtless in the rain for kicks and grins. ~ Raindrop23
Rating: 20 (+20/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (3)

  • Yes, I can't understand how anyboy would prefer a cold and un-dead men, when his best friend is so good looking and hot. ~ mirabella
  • I would say screw the vampire, but what do i know haha ~ Sharkboy
  • Yeah, still don't understand that. ~ OuranSweety

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#11

All teenage girls secretly long to be caught between two violent and unpredictable men. ~ Raiha
Rating: 18 (+19/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)


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#12

Suicide is the ultimate form of “I love you.” ~ Wayward Warrior
Rating: 18 (+19/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (3)

  • Also, Shakespeare pretty much goes "These two young fools are going to rush into things, and they will DIE for it" with the implication of "if you want to DIE, follow their example." ~ SomeGuy
  • It's so much the ultimate form that Shakespeare not only had Romeo commit suicide for Juliet but came up with a clever trick to make Juliet commit suicide for Romeo as well. ~ Eibhlinn Savage
  • Edward did not want to live in a world where there was no Bella ~ TexasGreatGrams

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#13

When transforming into a werewolf, remove your shirt so it won't get ripped apart. Don't worry about the pants though: they will stay intact and magically reapear once you transform back. ~ SainaTsukino
Rating: 18 (+18/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)

  • Jacob often carries his shorts in a band wrapped around his leg ~ TexasGreatGrams
  • LOL come on they hide pants in the forest haha ~ irg19

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#14

Vampires aren't allowed to kill in a way that will attract a lot of human attention, unless it involves killing entire groups of tourist at once. ~ Adam
Rating: 15 (+18/-3) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (3)

  • Yeah I was very sorry for the little kids bouncing around before the attack. Poor things never had a chance. ~ Sharkboy
  • Terrorists acts attract absolutely no attention at all! ;) ~ chobi chi
  • Nothing says subtle like a massive tourist massacre ~ Sage of Magic

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#15

Body glitter is officially in again. ~ Z
Rating: 15 (+16/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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    #16

    The first step to tending to anyone who has been injured is to take off your shirt. ~ Kaytea
    Rating: 14 (+14/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)

    • If that is the only thing you have to stop the bleeding..... ~ TexasGreatGrams

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    #17

    A guy who looks like he got in a fight with body glitter definitely screams DANGER TO YOUR HEALTH. ~ MaRona
    Rating: 14 (+14/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)

    • But... It's sooo shiny! ^-^ ~ neko nana mode
    • I love how my sister started suddenly laughing VERY loudly when Edward started to sparkle. The whole population of the movie theater glared at her, as threateningly as eight years old and other "preteens" can get ~ SainaTsukino

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    #18

    The best answer to getting dumped is to sit in the same spot and position for 3 months and refuse to bathe. ~ Raindrop23
    Rating: 14 (+14/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)

    • Ha! If a guy dumped me, I don't think that I would just sit and stare out of a window. I would at least try and get over it. ~ Alazne Chan

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    #19

    Werewolves are absolutely forbidden to tell humans about their existence. They are, however, allowed to HINT that they're werewolves in a manner that's not unlike a guessing game. ~ Adam
    Rating: 14 (+14/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (3)

    • Jacob was forbidden by the "alpha" wolf from telling her-but he had already told her in Twilight about the legend. ~ TexasGreatGrams
    • What's funny is that Bella has a painting of a wolf on her bedroom wall. Jake should have just pointed at it and then gestured to himself. ~ irg19
    • Isn't that how it always works? ~ OuranSweety

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    #20

    It's okay to fall for guys who sparkle, they aren't always gay. ~ Shauna
    Rating: 14 (+14/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)


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    #21

    The best message you can possibly send to hundreds of thousands of preteen girls is that climbing on the back of a motorcycle with a random guy who looks an awful lot like a rapist is a positive thing. ~ osakapower
    Rating: 14 (+14/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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      #22

      That creepy biker guy whose Harley you just jumped on the back of? Yeah, he’s just going to let you off at your earliest convenience. ~ Wayward Warrior
      Rating: 13 (+16/-3) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (3)

      • especially when you remember his friends as the would-be rapists from the first installment of the movie you're in. ~ Eibhlinn Savage
      • Well of course they all will be nice and let you off if your scared! *trys to cover laugh* ~ Sharkboy
      • My thoughts EXACTLY while watching the movie. -.- ~ Blood Huntress

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      #23

      When planning a surprise birthday for your human girlfriend, make sure to invite the recently-turned vampire with self-control issues. ~ Adam
      Rating: 13 (+13/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (4)

      • Jasper is a lot more recently turned to the vegetarian diet though. ~ Sazinata
      • Jasper is family-no matter that he has "vegetarian" issues. Besides, no one knew that Bella would cut herself. ~ TexasGreatGrams
      • They'll explain that one in Eclipse. Jasper's actually a former Civil War veteran. ~ NateSean
      • Jasper's not recently turned. He just hasn't been a "vegetarian" for as long as the rest of the Cullens. In fact, he's the second oldest of them if I recall correctly. ~ irg19

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      #24

      A movie titled "Face Punch" will have nothing but gunshot sound effects. ~ Adam
      Rating: 12 (+14/-2) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (7)


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      #25

      Mortals are, by default, comedic relief. ~ Wayward Warrior
      Rating: 12 (+12/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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        #26

        Italians do it better. ~ Wayward Warrior
        Rating: 12 (+15/-3) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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          #27

          If a girl slaps you, it’s okay to transform into a beast and try to bite her head off. Literally. ~ Wayward Warrior
          Rating: 12 (+14/-2) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (3)

          • Inability to control anger is one of the effects of the "wolf gene". ~ TexasGreatGrams
          • Well, technically he's a monster b/c he transformed into one. ~ kugen
          • Double standard! If a girl slaps a guy, she's 100% justified. If a guy transforms into a beast to retaliate, he's a monster. ~ Adam

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          #28

          Vampires enjoy skipping through the forest. ~ Raindrop23
          Rating: 12 (+14/-2) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)

          • LOL that scene...so funny. ~ irg19

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          #29

          There are no men's shirt stores in Forks, Washington. ~ Ace
          Rating: 12 (+13/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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            #30

            Just because the werewolf is in human form, doesn't mean you aren't a Furry. ~ neko nana mode
            Rating: 12 (+14/-2) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (3)

            • I've read this before, but i just now got it! (wow) but yeah... hmmm i wonder how that works ~ Sharkboy
            • if anyone doughts this stament read eerie cuties and u'll laugh ten times harder. ~ SPofSaturn
            • You made me laugh. ~ Adam

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            #31

            No one can ever use the metaphor of twilight again. THANKS! ~ tsukasaluver
            Rating: 12 (+12/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (9)

            • "Twilight" used to be one of my favourite English words. Ah f... it, it still is. I'm a Twilight groupie, there's no way I can't deny it. ~ Eibhlinn Savage
            • Yeah i saw the perfume it's "twilight woods" it's very cliche i think. ~ Sharkboy
            • And it used to be my favorite time of day. !_! ~ neko nana mode
            • there's a parfume called twillight. eh ~ SainaTsukino
            • I know! D: What the heck are we supposed to do about the stories that were actually good now? Something better take this word back. >_> ~ Atsil
            • THanks Twilight black list my favorite word ~ SPofSaturn
            • Short stories and poetry and other forthcoming literature shall henceforth be called dusk, dawn, night, day, midnight, sunset, blah blah blah, but never again Twilight. And Shugo and Kite and the glowie bracelet shall, alas, be s.o.l. ~ ThunderRollin
            • Yeah, The .Hack series used the twilight metaphor multiple times, and now I can never use it. :( ~ tsukasaluver
            • I've blacked out that word on my copy of Nietzsche's book "Twilight of the Idols." ~ Pleiades Rising

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            #32

            The most effective way for a vampire to commit suicide is not using a stake, but going to a faraway country to suicide by sparkle. ~ SainaTsukino
            Rating: 12 (+12/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (4)

            • What would be totally awesome now, is if someone wrote a song about. The Sparkle Suicide...tell me that doesn't sound like an awesome rock song. i would totally buy a whole record, just to find out what that song said... ~ Shauna
            • In the good old movies we had suicide by police, now we have suicide by sparkle! ~ SainaTsukino
            • Sparkly suicide...the thought of it still makes me chuckle ~ chobi chi
            • LOL! That is one of the most defective parts of the whole movie! ~ Alazne Chan

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            #33

            When a misunderstanding over the phone occurs, don't press "dial back" but run to the last known location of the caller. ~ SainaTsukino
            Rating: 12 (+15/-3) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)

            • It wouldn't change nothing, Edward destroy the cellphone when he "knew" that Bella was dead ~ mirabella
            • Alice would have seen that Edward destroyed his phone and it shows him destroy. ~ RachelHill

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            #34

            Just because she'll die for you doesn't mean she'll marry you. ~ WatcherAngel
            Rating: 12 (+12/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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              #35

              While vacationing at Volterra, Italy, do not accept any tours or enter strange buildings. ~ redabyssdistroyerkie
              Rating: 11 (+12/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)


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              #36

              If your boyfriend dumps you, you will scream uninterruptedly at night for three months and your father will only be moderately annoyed. ~ Loli Pop
              Rating: 11 (+12/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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                #37

                Edward's mind-reading ability would be of great use to the Volturi, even though they have someone with Edward's exact power, only much magnified. ~ Adam
                Rating: 10 (+15/-5) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (6)

                • yeah they should probably have explained that in the movie, that Aro may read every thought you've ever had but needs to touch you while that Edward can read your current thoughts from a couple miles away. ~ Eibhlinn Savage
                • Edward does not have to physically touch the person to read their mind. ~ TexasGreatGrams
                • No, this is completely wrong. Edward can sense only all that's CURRENTLY on the people's mind. His gift is not as powerful as Aro's, which can uncover everything that's subconscious, even past thoughts and memories. Edward's one can't. ~ Lorhen
                • Yeah the physical contact part is pretty disabling. ~ irg19
                • The only difference is that the Aro's ability only works with physical contact.. awesome site adam ~ animesick
                • XD good point ~ Wallpaperotaku

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                #38

                When your boyfriend dumps you, just take completely out-of-character, death-defying risks until he's forced to save you. Emotional blackmail works every time! ~ Bagheera
                Rating: 10 (+14/-4) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)

                • Bella wasn't trying to make Edward rescue her ~ TexasGreatGrams
                • Actually, that's pretty in character for Bella, unfortunately. Their whole relationship makes Romeo and Juliet look like Puritans. ~ NateSean

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                #39

                If you're a wise old man who knows all about mythology and whose son is a werewolf himself, don't seek refuge if you sense a vampire is near; instead, try to hunt her with your big, unwieldy shotgun. ~ Adam
                Rating: 10 (+11/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)

                • Harry was NOT Jacob's father. He wasn't hunting the vampire-he was trying to save Charlie's life. ~ TexasGreatGrams

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                #40

                Female werewolves rarely (never) rip off their clothes. And that is a great disappointment. ~ MokonaYi
                Rating: 10 (+10/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)

                • Read Eclipse-that is where the female werewolf (singularly) comes in. And she does sometime phase out of her clothes. ~ TexasGreatGrams
                • It's just so convenient.... ~ Grayfire

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                #41

                Love spelled backwards is "love" - not "evol." ~ Adam
                Rating: 9 (+13/-4) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)

                • Its a romantic comedy. Its not actually supposed to make any sense, much like Twilight itself. ~ Loli Pop

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                #42

                It's better to leave someone alone and defenseless against immortal beings trying to kill them than it is to stay with them and possibly cause a few bruises or papercuts. ~ Adam
                Rating: 9 (+10/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)

                • Even Edward admitted that he was very wrong ~ TexasGreatGrams
                • Exactly! It's so obvious...Edward can't see it! ~ chobi chi

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                #43

                Cops are always the last to know. ~ Wayward Warrior
                Rating: 9 (+9/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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                  #44

                  They'll let any old riff raff into public schools. ~ Adam
                  Rating: 8 (+9/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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                    #45

                    When in doubt, take your shirt off. It doesn't matter if you don't have abs, they can be airbrushed on. ~ Waffuru
                    Rating: 8 (+10/-2) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (3)

                    • Or you can really work out and gain 30 lbs of muscle ~ TexasGreatGrams
                    • Sounds just like 300. ~ tsukasaluver
                    • Who needs airbrush when you have foundation and body glitter? ~ ruushii

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                    #46

                    You don't need a passport to go to Italy. ~ SainaTsukino
                    Rating: 8 (+11/-3) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)

                    • If you watched the movie attentively, you would have seen that Bella was holding her passport on the way to Alice's car when Jacob was asking her to stay. Well, if you are talking about Bella. But if you were talking about the vampires, of course this is so true! :) ~ cj
                    • Thank my sister for this one ~ SainaTsukino

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                    #47

                    To be viewed as a food source is the ultimate form of loooove!! ~ umm
                    Rating: 8 (+9/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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                      #48

                      If a town is named after silverware that could possibly kill you, beware. ~ NanaNekoz
                      Rating: 8 (+9/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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                        #49

                        Being in an elevater with five vampires and stuck listening to opera on the way down is...awkward. ~ Jyanchan
                        Rating: 8 (+8/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)


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                        #50

                        Getting a tattoo is worth being scolded over; attempting to nearly kill yourself in order to hallucinate is peachy keen. ~ Wayward Warrior
                        Rating: 8 (+8/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)


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                        #51

                        You’ve never been to my city before? No worries. The urgency of your situation is totally the best navigation system. ~ Wayward Warrior
                        Rating: 7 (+9/-2) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)


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                        #52

                        Girls would rather cuddle with cold stone than a warm wolf. ~ Sage of Magic
                        Rating: 7 (+8/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)

                        • true that =) ~ nuknuk
                        • i would totally take the wolf anyday! Wolves are amazingly beautiful creatures with awesome eyes. The only problem with them is their smell when they've been out in the wild...it can be a bit rank. However, i would buy cologne and be happy! ~ Shauna

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                        #53

                        Doing dangerous things, like jumping off a cliff, riding a machine you know nothing about, and walking towards creepy people, just to hear your loved one's voice is never symbolism for suicide attempts. ~ Shadow Vampiress
                        Rating: 7 (+8/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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                          #54

                          I learned...nothing. ~ hisaishi
                          Rating: 7 (+9/-2) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)

                          • You can thank my sister for this one ~ hisaishi

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                          #55

                          Only one minor character in an entire family of vampires who supposedly love you very much will raise any concerns whatsoever about you deciding to become a soulless, undead vampire forever. ~ Adam
                          Rating: 7 (+8/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)


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                          #56

                          You can fall off a motorcycle that is skidding sideways and only get a few cuts, without bleeding, but when you get a paper cut you bleed all over yourself. ~ Shauna
                          Rating: 7 (+10/-3) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)

                          • Several things wrong with that one. The first, Bella does indeed bleed after falling off the bike. Did you miss the part where Jacob takes off his shirt to wipe off the blood? Second, Bella's paper cut isn't what makes her bleed all over herself. Edward throws her into a glass table which breaks when she hits it, thus cutting her more and producing the whole lot of blood. ~ irg19
                          • yeah. and paper cut from wrapping paper, no less ~ SainaTsukino

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                          #57

                          When you look at vampires through a werewolf's eyes, they look a lot more dead. ~ Shauna
                          Rating: 7 (+8/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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                            #58

                            All that glitters is not gold. ~ Adam
                            Rating: 7 (+10/-3) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)

                            • I agree, when I saw the trailer on the moment he is taking off his shirt or jacket whatever that was he looked awful, really ill and non-sexy at all! ~ YumeNai
                            • Nope. Nowadays, all that glitters are all Twilight vampire. Has anyone else noticed that in the movie, the only vampire that gets a chance to sparkle is Edward? ~ Alazne Chan

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                            #59

                            A papercut can almost get you killed if you're surronded by vamps, but, hum, "womanly problems" go unnoticed. ~ SainaTsukino
                            Rating: 7 (+8/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (4)

                            • lol..Yeah, that little "problem" is actually explained in Stephanie Meyer's site =) ~ LTC
                            • Good point. ~ NateSean
                            • That made me LOL tooXD Well observedXD ~ SaxGirl
                            • Haha, that made me LOL. ~ Adam

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                            #60

                            The hardest decision a teenage girl can make is whether she wants to date the guy who wants to kill her or the one that drinks out of the toilet. ~ wolfgirl92
                            Rating: 7 (+7/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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                              #61

                              the choice between necrophilia and beastiality is tough for a teenager.... ~ theattack
                              Rating: 7 (+7/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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                                #62

                                On-screen violence aggravates flu-like symptoms and induces vomiting. ~ Wayward Warrior
                                Rating: 6 (+7/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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                                  #63

                                  Don't worry. Acting like he's ready to eat you is just another way of saying he loves you. ~ Z
                                  Rating: 6 (+8/-2) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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                                    #64

                                    You have to fall for a man who comes up to you and says, "I'm bad for you" But can't fall for your best friend who is trying to protect you from the bad. ~ Shauna
                                    Rating: 6 (+8/-2) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)

                                    • well, bad boys are hot =)) ~ nuknuk

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                                    #65

                                    If you move up to Forks, Washington you never have to actually attend school if your dad is the town doctor. Everyone is just okay with you being gone for weeks at a time without question. ~ Shauna
                                    Rating: 6 (+8/-2) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (0)


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                                      #66

                                      If you eat animals you're a vegetarian vampire, but if you eat people you automatically become a monster. What if you eat both, does that make you an omni-vore? ~ Shauna
                                      Rating: 6 (+8/-2) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)

                                      • Such a conundrum. I bet some vampires try and kill themselves over it. ~ Grayfire

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                                      #67

                                      Sickly pale is the new tan. ~ Wayward Warrior
                                      Rating: 6 (+6/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)


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                                      #68

                                      It doesn't matter whether the movie is terrible or not, because at least 30% of girls going to see it are only there to see a shirtless hottie. ~ Melodicanth
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                                      #69

                                      Zombie movies are metaphors for leprosy and consumerism. ~ Adam
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                                        #70

                                        If your boyfriend gets controlled by a brooding alpha werewolf who stared at him menacingly for half the movie, the worst you can expect is that he'll get a haircut and maybe a tattoo. ~ Adam
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                                          #71

                                          Using the "jump off a tall place" trick from the old Superman movie does NOT work for vampires. ~ Adam
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                                            #72

                                            Papercuts attract vampires. ~ Shauna
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                                              #73

                                              Vampires are perfectly okay with Grand Theft Auto, if the car is pretty enough. ~ Shauna
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                                              • Especially if it's a luxury model ~ chobi chi

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                                              #74

                                              You're cooler than Elvis if you can walk in slow mo'. ~ Pleiades Rising
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                                                #75

                                                If you forget to mention a main character's "special ability" in the first movie that will come into play in the third movie, make sure you mention it in that character's first scene. ~ Invaderben
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                                                • It sucked that the Cullens hardly existed in the first movie. They couldn't have sandwiched one remark about Jasper's empath ability? ~ NateSean

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                                                #76

                                                If no mind-reader can read your mind, it does NOT mean your mind is blank. nuh-huh. ~ SainaTsukino
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                                                • Nah, just means the mind is "Up In Smoke" ~ Grayfire

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                                                #77

                                                When you leave your significant other, the best place to angst is an attic in South America. ~ Waffuru
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                                                • And not change clothes. ~ irg19
                                                • I'll have to remember that if I ever get a significant other. ~ Z

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                                                #78

                                                Hallucinations of the guy who dumped you are NOT a good reason to stop riding your motorcycle. ~ Blank of BBS
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                                                  #79

                                                  Paper cuts + vampires= bad. ~ MewChero
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                                                    #80

                                                    If you're not human, you would rather enter through the window than the door. ~ Shauna
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                                                      #81

                                                      If someone directly tells you "Don't do anything stupid..." the first thing you are naturally going to do is stupid, or to just sit there and cry. Either way...pretty stupid. ~ Shauna
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                                                        #82

                                                        If you live with the sherriff of the town you are living in, you are more than likely to have at least three people break into your house, one of them to steal crap. ~ Shauna
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                                                          #83

                                                          There's nothing wrong with suicide attempts bringing you closer to your beloved. ~ chobi chi
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                                                            #84

                                                            Werewolves are not hairy. ~ TripleZ
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                                                              #85

                                                              It's not always good to be a tourist. ~ Wayward Warrior
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                                                              • Tourist will always be an acceptable snack. ~ Loli Pop

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                                                              #86

                                                              A Mary Sue as a main character makes the movie that much more popular for preteen girls ~ SainaTsukino
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                                                                #87

                                                                Vampire sparkles are rainbow-colored. Like Skittles. ~ Wayward Warrior
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                                                                  #88

                                                                  To anyone who is considering jumping off of a highly elevated cliff into a rocky ocean grave for the sole purpose of seeing hallucinations of your sparkly yet abandonment-prone boyfriend: try heroin. ~ vaccuum
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                                                                    #89

                                                                    Vampires who are over 100 years old would rather leave town to live with their parents and siblings than stay behind and live on their own with the girl they love. ~ Adam
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                                                                      #90

                                                                      Even as a werewolf, your coat is always naturally groomed and never has any defects. ~ Shauna
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                                                                      • Well of course it's perfectly groomed, it there were any defaults they wouldn't attract the ladies as much! ~ Sharkboy

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                                                                      #91

                                                                      If you move to Forks, Washington you will immediately be considered awesome and popular, and be liked by all the boys in the school. ~ Shauna
                                                                      Rating: 3 (+4/-1) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (1)

                                                                      • Haha, it's true. I used to live in Forks :D ~ vaccuum

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                                                                      #92

                                                                      A cult effectively stops being just that when you join and realize how different things really are. Uh huh, sure. ~ Wayward Warrior
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                                                                      • Its not a cult. Its ~different~ They have ~tattoos~ ~ Loli Pop

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                                                                      #93

                                                                      Girls in a movie theater will go "oooh" when they see Jacob take his shirt off but in Edward's first shirtless scene one girl will shout, "ick" to the applause of the rest of the theater. (Actually happened when I went to see this. Poor Rob.) ~ NateSean
                                                                      Rating: 3 (+3/-0) | Register to Vote! | Register to Favorite! | (2)

                                                                      • yeah i'm reading a lot of things about Rob's weird possibly CGI nipple... ~ Eibhlinn Savage
                                                                      • my sister was laughing out loud, very loud ~ SainaTsukino

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                                                                      #94

                                                                      Some vampires in past lives were wizards. ~ hisaishi
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                                                                      • sorry. It should be vampires. ~ hisaishi

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                                                                      #95

                                                                      Just because a girl is beautiful DOES NOT mean you should follow her everywhere. ~ Shauna
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                                                                        #96

                                                                        After your boyfriend comes back from almost killing himself, you have to immediately choose between him and your best friend. ~ Sharkboy
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                                                                          #97

                                                                          As a werewolf you are required to either go shirtless or wear a shirt to where it doesn't matter if it's on or not. ~ Shauna
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                                                                            #98

                                                                            As a little side note: You should never tell another guy - who may or may not be a werewolf - that you love him right in front of a vampire who can kill you at any second. Especially when you love the vampire too. ~ Alazne Chan
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                                                                              #99

                                                                              If you see a fire in the ocean, you are either hallucinating or a crazy vampire, which is after you, is being chased by a bunch of giant wolves. ~ xXdeathnoteluvrzXx
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                                                                                #100

                                                                                Nearly dying for the sake of hallucinations is a perfectly logical idea! ~ Koda
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                                                                                  #101

                                                                                  Werewolves don't give off the wet dog smell. ~ Yuki
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                                                                                    #102

                                                                                    Bloody hell, Harry! Cedric Diggory didn't die after all! Take that Voldemort! ~ antonia dinozo
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                                                                                      #103

                                                                                      If vampirism makes one beautiful, explain Marcus. ~ wiinterrr
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                                                                                      #104

                                                                                      Vampires do show up on film. ~ Halfsh0t
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                                                                                        #105

                                                                                        Your boyfriend is more than happy to read a werewolf’s mind for his own benefit and amusement, but when you ask him what said werewolf is thinking and if he’s going to hurt you, all you get is a blank stare. Guess you’re on your own, peaches. ~ SkyolaGrl
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                                                                                          #106

                                                                                          Geeks are ugly, but sickly, pale, 100 year old vampires are considered hot. ~ Wolfie7
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                                                                                            #107

                                                                                            Red cloaks symbolize victory over vampires. ~ Wayward Warrior
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                                                                                              #108

                                                                                              When you're a vampire who is friends with a clumsy human, definitely wrap their gifts, no matter how high the risks of a paper cut are. ~ MewChero
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                                                                                                #109

                                                                                                Your dad won't let you see the one man you care about and have been with for a long time, but he's okay with you going to another town to watch a movie with a girl you barely know, but calls herself your friend. ~ Shauna
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                                                                                                  #110

                                                                                                  If you are in a love fight between a vampire and a werewolf you are more than likely to have a whole bunch of nightmares if someone is not there for you. ~ Shauna
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                                                                                                    #111

                                                                                                    Love bites. Haha, get it? ~ Wayward Warrior
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                                                                                                      #112

                                                                                                      It's okay to use people as a means to an end. ~ Wayward Warrior
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                                                                                                        #113

                                                                                                        When you've almost been supper for your vampire boyfriend's newly vegetarian brother, it is a good idea to act sexy (read:creepy eyes) and ask for a birthday kiss after the ordeal, thereby making sure your overprotective boyfriend won't do anything rash ... such as require the entire family to lose contact with you for months. ~ Silver
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                                                                                                          #114

                                                                                                          It's okay to ignore your dad's pal's death to pursue your love and continue ignoring it when you get your love back. ~ blah and more blah
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                                                                                                            #115

                                                                                                            Middleaged women have no problem showing their lust over Edward shirtless seeing as how he's over a 100 years old. When Jacob removes his shirt they must contain a silent squeee to themselves for fear of being labeled as pedophiles. ~ CowgirlJ
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                                                                                                              #116

                                                                                                              There's a vampire hunting you, your best friend (a werewolf) is hunting the vampire, and your father is hunting your best friend. What's the best thing you can do? Going to leapt into the water from a cliff. ~ mirabella
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                                                                                                                #117

                                                                                                                If your vampire boyfriend asks you to take a walk with him after a few days of not speaking to you...heads up, it will not end well. ~ Sassy
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                                                                                                                  #118

                                                                                                                  Edward is a slow learner. That's twice he's left Bella alone, thinking she would be safer, only to have someone with a grudge against him attempt to kill her. ~ NateSean
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                                                                                                                    #119

                                                                                                                    When you are 108 years old and dating a 17 year old, being a vampire let's you off the hook from pedophilia ~ nuknuk
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                                                                                                                    • well she IS over the age of consent and they're not having sex anyway because he watched too many Jonas Brothers music videos. ~ Eibhlinn Savage

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                                                                                                                    #120

                                                                                                                    The requirements for being the perfect boyfriend: 1) Glittering 2)Having an appetite for the girl's blood 3) Being considerably older than the girl (like 100 years older) 4) Constantly abandoning her 5) Being suicidal 6)Being homicidal 7) Being pedophile 8) Breaking into her room to watch her sleep 9)Having great cars and a big house ~ nuknuk
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                                                                                                                      #121

                                                                                                                      Werefols don't know the exact meaning of secret. Case in point: Jacob says "Have you ever had a secret... that you couldn't tell anyone?". Secret = sth that you can't tell anyone, right? ~ nuknuk
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                                                                                                                        #122

                                                                                                                        While practically fooling around with your friend's six pack ( who you know loves you), keep talking about how much you love your ex-boyfriend. ~ mannerino
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                                                                                                                          #123

                                                                                                                          If you have a vampire as a best friend you either have to have an awesome car, or your car has to have an awesome sound system. ~ Shauna
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                                                                                                                            #124

                                                                                                                            There are no ugly vampires. (Personal preferences notwithstanding.) ~ Wayward Warrior
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                                                                                                                              #125

                                                                                                                              Vampires are all for oligarchy. ~ Wayward Warrior
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                                                                                                                                #126

                                                                                                                                People have been telling Bella to just go jump off a cliff for months now... im glad she finally listened to someone other than herself (oh, and if you start hearing and seeing your ex-boyfriend without him actually being there, that's a good sign that you should start seeing a psycologist). ~ LadyDaralis
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                                                                                                                                  #127

                                                                                                                                  Leprosy isn't funny. ~ irg19
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                                                                                                                                    #128

                                                                                                                                    Watching this movie and talking smack about this movie have nothing to do with one another. The fact that you don't need to know that plot to do that makes it fun! ~ umm
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                                                                                                                                      #129

                                                                                                                                      Werewolves have telepathic abilities. ~ k1ngv1rus
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                                                                                                                                      • In the books werewolves can communicate with each other when they're in animal form. Of course they never mention the abilities of characters other than Edward until it's convenient to the plot. ~ NateSean

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                                                                                                                                      #130

                                                                                                                                      When being held by the throat from a vampire you will continue to look tough only to suffer a heart attack after the werewolf whose paw print you just erased saves you from her. ~ CowgirlJ
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                                                                                                                                        #131

                                                                                                                                        A newly vegetarian vampire will only use a paper cut as an excuse to attack a teenage girl, when the reality is he did it because she earlier shamed him into shutting his mouth due to her bad feelings of being wished a happy birthday. ~ CowgirlJ
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                                                                                                                                          #132

                                                                                                                                          Even vampires have bad hair days. ~ Halfsh0t
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                                                                                                                                            #133

                                                                                                                                            You can't run with Vampires. They're fast. ~ Halfsh0t
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                                                                                                                                              #134

                                                                                                                                              Old women are still found tastefully sexy in reflections in the middle of a meadow. ~ Shineska
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                                                                                                                                                #135

                                                                                                                                                Poor Jacob thought being shirtless would help her with the decision on who to be with. Sorry Jacob, you did it ten other times in the movie. Just not now. But be on the look out. ~ Shineska
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                                                                                                                                                  #136

                                                                                                                                                  Edward was just going out for a simple tan he long needed. But no, Bella had to stop him for theatrics. FOR LOVE. ~ Shineska
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                                                                                                                                                    #137

                                                                                                                                                    When you become a werewolf - you get a tat, a haircut, lose your shirt and are perpetually hot. ~ kerina
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                                                                                                                                                      #138

                                                                                                                                                      Werewolves can't wait for a full moon. ~ Freeman
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                                                                                                                                                        #139

                                                                                                                                                        Vampires enjoy elevator music. ~ magpie34
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                                                                                                                                                          #140

                                                                                                                                                          Scoffing is a perfectly, not at all annoying way to express one self verbally. ~ Sassy
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                                                                                                                                                            #141

                                                                                                                                                            Going to Italy from Brasil takes 2 days less than going there from USA ~ nuknuk
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                                                                                                                                                              #142

                                                                                                                                                              Bella has become THE TEASE FROM HELL!!! ~ mannerino
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                                                                                                                                                                #143

                                                                                                                                                                GET READY FANGIRLS. JACOB IS STILL SINGLE. ~ Shineska
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