Seriously? The bad guy died just like that? link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A lion hunting a tuna in the middle of the ocean just doesn't make sense... link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The sound of Will Ferrell's piss hitting the urinal... it sounds feminine... at least according to Mark Wahlberg... link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

Passing naughty messages using your grandmother as the messenger is just plain wrong... link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

Batman is now in charge of the police department... link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

I never actually thought learning something out of sarcasm could come in handy... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Pimps don't cry? Really? link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If you're in a room full of bad guys with guns shooting at you... the chances of you getting out alive are still high. Very high... link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

The only reason superman has superpowers is because he's vegan... link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

There's a reason why she never calls it "7 evil ex-boyfriends"... She was once bi-curious... link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

Everyone who works for the American government is a Russian spy... except of course if he or she is black... link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

The most resilient parasite is "an idea"! link
Rating: 5 (+5/-0)

Predators understand English but can't speak it. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Never trust the least threatening individual in your group, especially when he claims he's a doctor. He might probably be a murdering nutcase. link
Rating: 5 (+5/-0)

The sight of brutally killing a predator is actually child-friendly. All that slime oozing around is kinda cute. Cute in a brutal way, that is. link
Rating: -2 (+2/-4)

even Satan has no authority in turning down a rock face-off. It's the rules. Even the devil has to abide by them. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

The easiest way to fake your own death is to be in prison. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

its okay to pre-ejaculate during foreplay as long as it's Alice Eve that's grinding on top of you. doing this on any other woman would be an embarrassment. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If your wife and child die in a car accident, the only acceptable job left for you is to be a utility man. link
Rating: -2 (+1/-3)

don't be intimidated by angels. God only gave them the power of flight and immortality. Cut off their wings and they would make a perfect victim for a serial killer to bring home to. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Theological fact: Only 2 archangels out of 7 can walk the earth with their actual physical form. The rest of the 5 archangels and other types of angels need a human host to possess. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Apparently, God needs an archangel to prove something that "He" is already suppose to know... and when Michael proved his point... I bet God said "I already know that, i was just playin' with ya'." link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

never ask sub-zero for help... he wont appear again... never employ scorpion.... he will wont appear again either... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

I'm sure Chinese people wont be disappointed if a black kid defeats all their young martial artists in their own martial arts... link
Rating: -2 (+0/-2)

BARAKA has a special ability to turn into SCORPION right before he falls into a pit of fire after being defeated by LIU KANG... seriously... go check it out in slow mo... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When zombies rule the world, pranks can be deadly. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

No hadou kens, no fire balls, no yoga fires, no tigers, no sonic booms... but bison can fly... link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

there is such a thing as "time out". link
Rating: -1 (+0/-1)

I can feel your anger growing inside--- oh wait a minute! time out! link
Rating: -1 (+0/-1)

Never punch a guy when he's trying to calm you down in a fight. He will steal your girlfriend for revenge. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The only way to confirm that you traveled back in time to the 80's is to ask somebody the skin color of Michael Jackson. link
Rating: 2 (+3/-1)

Only a hooker can make you realize that you love the only girl you hang out with. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The jedi mind control trick only works on escorts. link
Rating: -1 (+0/-1)

If you have an online girlfriend, you will never be distracted when you chat with her even if a totally hot chick like Kristen Bell shows you her breasts. link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

never trust 11-year old school girls. never! link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

Medical fact: The treatment for a food coma is celery. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The girl you have a crush on who hates you will eventually like you if you admit you have a dragon for a pet. Works all the time. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Godzilla is the king of all dragons! link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

Scientific fact: Dragons are allergic to eels. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

If you're a viking, never intimately touch your helmet. It might remind you of your mother. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Saying dirty words before you bone your girlfriend in an all-girl-dormitory, of which the landlady does not know of your unconsented sleepover, is not a good idea... especially if those words are the idea of your alter ego... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

After you loose your virginity, you're going to jail. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

its quite odd that Amanda Seyfried accepted a role that doesn't "sleep around". link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Never tell a super hot female government agent (in a video call) that you were dying... your girlfriend will surely find out in the party line... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Never starve a vampire soldier... if they feed... it looks really, really gay.... link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The most effective way to make your ex-girlfriend jealous, is to bring a girl who doesn't wear underwear on your family dinner... link
Rating: 5 (+5/-0)

Just admit that you ejaculated on your pants and everything will be okay link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

If you want to meet an average nice guy, purposely leave your iPhone on airport security. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The best way to get a kiss on the first date is to screw up your seatbelt. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Having a straight married man shave your balls is NOT, in any way, gay. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)