Owners of gun ranges are always willing to take on a bunch of bad guys with you. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

If you want help from the owner of a gun range, be a good shot. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Of course you can get by without having a car or even a license; just take the car of the last person you beat the crap out of. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

You shouldn't play with guns if you don't want to get hurt. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The best way to win a fight against people with baseball bats, crow bars, or any long object people use to beat other people with is to jump into a bath tub. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

People should know by now that people are impatient and won't wait until you get back to confront the bad guy. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

People who talk too much increase their chances of being killed. A guy who does everything necessary in order to survive, no matter the costs, should know that. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

After being in so many fights, you can predict exactly what will happen in them. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Showing off your slave's scars is appropriate at dinner time. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Someone given the chance to pick out their own clothes after years of being told what to wear will pick out the flashiest, most ridiculous clothing they can find. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

After introducing yourself, don't forget to introduce your horse. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Words are the way to freedom when you don't have a gun. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Rap music was popular in the pre-Civil War era. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Acquiring a receipt is very important after buying a slave and freeing him or her. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Once you kill off some Australian slave traders and take one of their horses, take the saddle and bridle off the horse before you ride him back to save your wife. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Some people will die just to avoid shaking someone's hand. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The dogs ripping that guy apart were Dutch Shepherds. Yes, that's what you should have been thinking during that scene. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

People shot in plantation houses defy the laws of physics. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Sonic the Hedgehog is all about safety. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If an arcade game breaks, the owner of the arcade won't try to fix it or get someone to fix it. He will just put an "out of order" sign on the game and wait to see if said game fixes itself by the next day. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

In a game where the point is to race candy race cars around a candy track, the developers felt it necessary to make candy trees where the branches with double bars disappear when touched. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If Fix-It Felix's magic hammer can fix anything, including his face when someone punches it, couldn't it have fixed Vanellope's glitch? link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Glitching can be controlled. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Even though the guy you just met is terrified to go back into his game, and you don't regenerate if you die in a game other than yours, it's nothing to go try and win a medal in said game. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

All games in an arcade are connected through power cables and outlets. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Even though you're only playing the bad guy, your co-workers take it seriously and make you sleep in a dump. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Mutant bugs make it a point to crash weddings. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

You know a game as cutesy and hyperactive as "Sugar Rush" is from Japan. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

When you're trying to convince your co-workers that you're not really bad and just want a piece of cake, it's probably not a good idea to lose your temper and smash said cake. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Don't use a hammer made to magically fix things to break out of a jail cell. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

When you play a first person shooter, you're actually controlling a portable monitor inside the game. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

When the king of Sugar Rush who's hellbent on keeping one character from racing tells you if said character races she'll cause the game to be turned off, believe him. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Even though when a certain character crosses the finish line in a race it's supposed to reset the whole game, it won't fix said character's glitch. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Putting mentos in diet coke causes a hot enough explosion of cola to vaporize monsters. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The Japanese girl group AKB48 records music for videogames. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

This movie doesn't have Jason Bourne in it, so let's show his picture every once in awhile and refer to Treadstone a few times just so this movie can be part of the franchise. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If you do drugs, wolves won't think you're human. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If wolves won't quit hunting you in the Alaskan wilderness, whoop their ass. Then, blow them up. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Go swimming in Alaska just for the heck of it. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

If someone breaks into your house and saves your life it's acceptable to give them drugs, even if those drugs are in the Philippines. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Somehow, all of these agents ended up under a log cabin in Alaska and they all decided to carve their names on the boards. Of course Jason Bourne did too. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If you see two people have a motorcycle wreck, and you saw one person died in another motorcycle wreck one of the two caused, take them aboard your boat for a trip. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Dark alleyways are very narrow in the Philippines. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

After you've killed one thug on the first story of the house, go outside and parkour your way up to the second story window right in time to kill the next thug. Should be easy. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Selina was the only one with any sense to shoot Bane. link
Rating: 2 (+3/-1)

Scarecrow always manages to show up somewhere in Nolan's Batman Trilogy. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Cops that have been underground with little amenities for 3 months look pretty clean. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

When the stadium is collapsing all around him the cameraman will keep filming Bane. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The authorities expect someone to stay in the plane. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

No one made the connection that when Batman disappeared so did Bruce Wayne. link
Rating: 2 (+3/-1)

If Marion Cotillard is in a movie she is not to be trusted. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

If Selina Kyle kisses you check to see if anything has been stolen. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Robin's real name is Robin. link
Rating: 3 (+4/-1)

It takes no time at all for Bruce to get to the other side of the world and get past the guards to save his city. And you thought Batman didn't have any superpowers... link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

Throw a grenade at a blocked tunnel just for the explosion. Said grenade isn't going to do a flipping thing, and you know someone else is actually going to blow a hole in the debris, but might as well take the opportunity to make another explosion! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A broken back can be healed enough in about 3 months that if you fall repeatedly from a great height with a rope tied around your body, gravity and said rope won't cause your back to break again. In fact, if your back has ever been broken, it will heal stronger than a person's back that's never been broken. link
Rating: 4 (+5/-1)

If two people get caught in a pouring rainstorm and rush inside a house, especially if said storm caused the electricity to go out, they will have sex. link
Rating: 2 (+4/-2)

Alfred is so desperate for Bruce to get a girlfriend that he's willing to set him up with criminals. link
Rating: 2 (+3/-1)

Although Bruce needed a contraption strapped to his crippled knee in order to walk on it without a cane before, when he gets thrown into a well-prison and after getting his back healed while also doing a lot of pushups, he's able to walk, run, climb, and jump on it. It must have been a wishing well. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Bruce Wayne must have gone to that cafe (that Alfred never described to him or told him where he went on vacation) every day with his girlfriend until he saw Alfred just so he could fulfill Alfred's wish for him. Dedication. link
Rating: 5 (+7/-2)

In the future, sexism is still pretty rampant as evidenced by the surgery machine configured only for men. link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

When performing a cesarian to remove an alien baby, you won't have to cut through any reproductive organs. link
Rating: 0 (+2/-2)

Some 50-year-old men can still perform slick moves with their axe. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If you're no good with guns, learn how to do slick action moves with an axe instead. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Right when Abe's mentor (who Abe doesn't know is a vampire) is feeding, the person who hates vampires the most will walk in on him. How ironic. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

It's ironic the friendly vampire will offer to turn Abe into a vampire right before he's assassinated. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

I guess since only impure people become vampires, black people must all be pure. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Don't be suspicious of someone who can toss a vampire over a building. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

You will be promoted to manager if you eat potato salad off of your girlfriend's bottom behind the deli counter. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

There are some situations where it's ok to punch a kid. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

You shouldn't call 9-1-1 if someone just took your teddy bear. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If you peek while counting during hide-and-seek, you'll get kid cancer. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Michelob Ultra Tuscan Orange Grapefruit. What is American coming to? link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

"You can't have any pudding if you don't eat your meat!" link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Oh c'mon. Ted doesn't sound THAT much like Peter Griffin. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

You never should've trusted Ted; he's on drugs! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Just from one gentlemen to another, I hope you get Lou Gehrig's Disease. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

This is art. Get it? link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

"Thank you for creeping out my night, and may Christ be with you." link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If you have sex with a cashier on top of the produce you sell to consumers, you will be promoted. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

White trash names have a "-lynn" at the end of them. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

No, he's not just happy to see you. That IS a Flash Gordon ray gun. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The guy said there ain't hardly been no murders in it, so that apartment is great! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Ladies don't mind if a teddy bear touches their boob. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If you talk shit to a future employer who's never had it talked to him, he will hire you. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If a hot guy hits hits a woman accidentally, it won't hurt. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Christmas is the one time of the year when Boston children get together to beat up the Jewish kids. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The Jewish kids want to be beaten up. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Nothing is as magical as a boy's wish...except an Apache helicopter. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Ted is just like the baby Jesus. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

LOOK WHAT JESUS DID!!! LOOK WHAT JESUS DID!!! LOOK WHAT JESUS DID!!! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

No matter how big a splash you make in the world, eventually, nobody gives a shit. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Teddy bears ride dogs instead of horses. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

"Oh shit it's 9-11! I've gotta get high!" link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When you say, "It's not my fault," you don't expect a follow-up question. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Sometimes, when you get f***ed up, you want someone to beat you up. You will even thank them afterwards. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If a woman farts in her sleep, that's a dealbreaker. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Where's Ted's ring, motherf***er?!! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

It's only cannibalism if you swallow. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Thunder is just God's farts. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)