Decepticon-powered Chevy Suburbans actually CAN overtake a Camaro, Corvette and Ferrari... link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

After finding out that Dylan has been in league with the Decepticons for quite a few years, I think its worth re-examining all those race trophies and wins. Cheater, maybe? link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Glorified accountants with huge vintage car collections will do anything for a chance to rule the world. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

No matter how many medals you have, no matter how many times you save the world, that whole "FBI was searching for you" thing is gonna really throw a monkeywrench in the ol' getting hired thing. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Of course, simply being the "messenger" in a galactic war between two advanced robot-alien factions isn't too shabby a position. It's way better than "innocent bystander that Megatron flicked into a taxi". link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Referring to the kid that a) killed Megatron with the Allspark, and b) resurrected the only Autobot capable of defeating the Fallen as simply a "messenger" means that a certain NSA Director didn't thoroughly read her briefings... link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Green Adidas jumpsuits are not suitable attire for empty-nesters. They're not suitable attire for the general population, either. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Sometimes, you just need to arrange your own ride home. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Don't make fun of the kid driving the crappy Datsun. His other car could be an overprotective Camaro with a bad attitude. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

New to Webster's dictionary in 2011: "Bayhem - the art of firing explosives for the purposes of replacing cinematography, script, and/or plot. Used as a visual distraction. References see: 'Unnecessary fillers', 'Poor direction.'" link
Rating: 6 (+6/-0)

Epps is pretty gung-ho about kickin' some Decepticon ass up until it's time to actually get into the battlezone. And, before that, he took a job watching a launch pad!? Yep - that guy's a wuss. link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

NEST soldiers can wing-suit through urban landscapes like decade-experienced pros. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Frenzy - beheaded (twice). Ravage - spine ripped out his butt (ouch). Laserbeak - head shot off with a cannon. I don't think being one of Soundwave's minions is all that great a profession. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Speaking of "The Duchess", how 'bout that Kate Middleton chick? Hey? Huh? link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Knowing that he was going to betray OP and the 'Bots, Sentinel Prime decides not to take the Matrix of Leadership - the greatest source of power left in existence - when it's offered? Uh, with instincts like that, it's no wonder his leadership wasn't that successful. link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

So - Sentinel Prime's Autobots were getting their butts kicked so bad that he had to resort to dealing with Megatron, yet he picks a fight with Megs over the difference between "working FOR him" and "working WITH him"? That's ballsy, dude... link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The Wreckers got their name due to the fact that, despite their alt-modes being littered with guns and cannons, they prefer to rip their enemies to pieces with their bare hands. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Despite your geeky looks, bad hair day, and busting a crystal lamp in the Oval Office foyer, all you need to pick up the rich, British Embassy hottie is a medal from Obama and a finger-point-gun maneuver. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Maybe it was just my theatre, but "Mirage" and "Wheeljack" came out sounding an awful lot like "Dino" and "Q"... link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

The Decepticons decided to move the focal point of their attack to Chicago 'cause they couldn't get filming permission from D.C. New York and Philadelphia just didn't make sense. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Back on Cybertron, before the war, Sideswipe was the Rollerskating Disco King. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Predictably, the Ferrari speaks with an Italian accent, but the Mercedes is British? And don't get me started on the Irish NASCARs... The Autobot UN must be all messed up. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

You know, for your next-to-last statement before death, "Class Dismissed" after kickin' your enemy's ass has gotta rank up there as pretty awesome. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Staring out the window will not bring dead co-workers back to life. Word to the wise. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Even if your boss categorically detests red, he won't mind when your Victoria's Secret model of a girlfriend comes and drops off some Red Twizzlers. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

If a tiny Asian guy walks out of a toilet cubicle with another guy, and then immediately gets into a stare down with me, I'd probably flinch pretty quick too... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Always be suspicious when your girlfriend's boss gives her a $200,000 car. I mean, despite the obvious reasons, the whole "Decepticon Bad Guy in alt mode" thing is also pretty compelling. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

I'd have to agree with Mom, you annoying prick - you got two world class hotties - don't count on getting a third. At least, not without another movie franchise and a sympathetic casting director. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Despite the fact I thought he'd reached his plateau, apparently spray tan CAN make John Malkovich creepier. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Reminder from PETA: Rabbits' feet are cruel good luck charms. Even for stuffed bunnies. Damn - she just tore that poor foot off! link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

I don't think Rolex made that watch. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Optimus Prime might not be doing a lot of arm-wrestling for awhile, but I don't think its wise for Decepticons to start picking fights with him. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Even if you're the most-ass-kickingest-Autobot of all time, if you're not careful flying around you'll still get tangled up in crane wires. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

While the Autobots learned Earth's languages through the World Wide Web, their former leader - who's been on the cusp of death for decades - will automatically be able to communicate in English upon being revived. link
Rating: 4 (+4/-0)

Dr. McDreamy's a real asshole. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

At 128-bit, the encryption on the entire City of Chicago Bridge system is less than the security on Ebay. Quite possibly less than 100thingsilearned.com as well. Good Job, Windy City! link
Rating: 2 (+3/-1)

Every manservant/assistant, no matter how flowery their voice and mannerisms, will be able to kick more ass than their (former) Secret Agent bosses. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

I know there were guns in the room, but retired Russian Cosmonauts in hiding are pretty quick to give up super secret information. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

After Optimus shoots a Decepticon fighter out of the air - despite the fact its trained pilot couldn't use it anymore - an Autobot will be able to just climb in and go. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

It's been so long since I've been to the movies, I'm not even relevant on 100 Things I Learned anymore... even though Shinzon was in this one. link
Rating: -2 (+0/-2)

The White House is the single greatest home court advantage in the modern world. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Putting your foot in your mouth in the presence of the President really sucks. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The Quebec Conference was not a hockey league with 6 teams. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The security guards at the White House likely know who Frank Capra is. Don't condescend or underestimate them... oh, and enjoy your trip to the White House. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The time between late morning and sundown in Sam's world is about equal to the time it takes to ride his bike downtown (away from his 'haunted' car) and then have a Michael Bay-esque car chase scene with the bad Decepticon. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

I wasn't aware you could even get Asteroid insurance... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Scorponok must not like Red Sox fans... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

I wouldn't want to live as Megatron's pet either... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Even if you're a super-advanced alien robot, getting shot in the nards hurts. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Starscream transforms and flies off directly above the boy holding the freakin' cube and doesn't lay a hand on him? Yeah, that's why Megatron thinks he's incompetent. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

The Optimus Prime I grew up with NEVER ended any battles by decapitating Decepticons... but I have to admit, the new OP is pretty badass... link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

When the meanest, nastiest Decepticon ever comes walking around the corner, and your buddy shouts "Fall Back!" - just stand there and fire your peashooter at him... Yeah, that won't result in you being torn to pieces... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Ol' Ironhide does the jump, roll and shoot way better than James T. Kirk. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The explosive force that blows the legs off a Transformer will only knock down the two teenagers standing 15 feet away... and they'll be in good enough shape to start running around the city. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Cars cut lengthwise - hood to trunk - will split into the front and back halves. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The idea of maintaining consistent mass through transformations was one of the main reasons Michael Bay didn't have Soundwave in this movie as a cassette deck (and substituted Frenzy), but the freakin' 125,00 cubic foot cube minimizing to the point a teenage boy could carry it was A-OK. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Counting to 3 trumps counting to 5... and when the guy holding the gun is counting to 3, you should really let the camaro go. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

In the post 9/11 era, an F22 can fly over the domestic USA to Nevada and shoot up Hoover Dam without so much as the Air Force checking in... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Army personnel and Sector 7 agents aren't impressed with your knowledge of the difference between Freddy Krueger and Wolverine claw marks. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

With a confirmed shooting onboard Air Force One, and the assailant not apprehended, there won't be added security teams or perimeters set up when the plane lands. They'll even let un-recognized police vehicles on the tarmac. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Hiding awkwardly under a bridge deck is not necessarily better than using your natural transforming ability to disguise yourself in plain site. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When fleeing the authorities, its better to have the teenagers sit unsecured on the shoulder of the biggest robot while he runs, rather than jumping in the cockpit of the camaro and speeding off down the road. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Nope, that one doesn't have the distance... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A tie with a sleeveless jacket still looks a little low-budget to me... I guess if you're a ballplayer, you can still get into a high class restaurant with that kinda outfit. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Drink Jobu's rum, get plunked on the head... Seems perfectly karmic to me. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If Vaughn really was "just a bit outside" then that's the biggest f'n strike zone I've ever seen. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Yeah, practicing Voodoo might require a little religious freedom. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Getting into the California Penal league can be as easy as stealing a car. The team showers are a little scary, though. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Only problem is, he didn't cut you... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

We're not sure who the post-game show is brought to you by, but frankly, it's not that important anyways... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Making the league minimum is not the best way to tell your ex-girlfriend's pretentious friends that you're a gamer. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Nothing like the Ol' #1 right down the pipe to get the final K. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Heck, if you offered me cigars and rum, I'd go out and try to hit a curveball. I'd probably be even less effective than Jobu, but I'd still be willing to try. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

It seems like giving free admission to the people that were actually alive the last time the Indians won a pennant would be a pretty cheap promo. At least back in '89, that is... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Even the immigrant grounds crew workers think the Indians are gonna be crappy. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Calling yard and then bunting down the third baseline is a pretty gutsy (and damn effective) little bit o' ball playing. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Golf club covers make good hats for bats. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The Cleveland Indians - they have their own uniforms and everything... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Bob Eubanks/Harry Doyle - could this movie have been complete without him? I doubt it... Now how about another round o' bourbon, Harry? link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Lou's idea of his kinda team makes me weep a little... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

I'm sure that guy she was with was a close personal friend too, but I have absolutely no idea what he was doing with her panties on his head... sounds like a good party, though. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Apparently Jobu doesn't help too much with bats, either. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Not always, but sometimes, if you're a ballplayer in a crappy dive bar, and some dastardly hot cougar tells you you're the sexiest man she's ever laid eyes on, it might be a good idea to ask if she's your 3rd baseman's wife. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Dorn's not high-priced talent. He's just high-priced. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Yeah, there's no way that ball woulda been outta Yellowstone. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

They're outta towels, and Lou's too old to be diving into lockers... atta boy. Anybody that can give the boss lady a piece of his mind while dangling in the breeze is worthy of a beer and slap on the back. Just put some f'n clothes on first, m'kay? link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If you're gonna steal second, ALWAYS make sure your shoelaces are tied. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Monty's not the best colorman in the league for nothing, folks... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

That "ole" crap is only good for bullfighting... certainly not for baseball. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Dorn was so much better when he was just a ballplayer. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

He runs like Hayes, but he hits like shit... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If a chick bet me $50 that she had a better body than my girlfriend, I don't know if bedding her would be the best way to defend my girl's honor... Just sayin'. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

White walls / managing a major league ball team... Tough call... tough call. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If you're broadcasting the Indians' games, you can curse on the air. Nobody's listening anyways. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Having a dead guy on the roster isn't the most effective way to field a team. Of course, that's easily remedied by just crossing him off the list. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The American Express Card - don't steal home without it... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Sometimes, snot is a good little rub to put on the ball to get a little more speed and action. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Seriously. My first learning is that I can't believe a list hasn't already been started for one of the best all-time baseball movies. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

They wear caps and sleeves in the major leagues... link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

California Penal manages to output some wicked fast pitchers. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)