The intense heat from an optic beam won't transfer into your body and heat up the metal bones in your forearms and cook the skin, but will make your metal claws glow really rad! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Bones coated with Adamantium, being far heavier than normal, won't affect the ligaments holding the bones together and the tendons holding the muscles to the now-coated bones. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Optic blasts can easily destroy concrete and make indestructible metal red-hot, but they're useless against Sabertooth's clothing. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

It's highly professional to not write to another professional asking about his methods, simply because you don't know him. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Angels speak German, naturally, and you'll understand 'em no matter your nationality. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Knocking the dirt from someone's coat can be seen as a sexy turn-on. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The best way to get clear and unbiased results for a theory is to conduct an experiment involving both your wife and your patient, and also involving heavily loaded and slanted terms. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Jung knew how to drive the ladies mad - and he had PSYCHIC POWERS. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When you dream of a horse, it's really about your inadequate penis being repressed and frustrated by everything around you. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If a fellow doctor points out his wife's wealth, slyly shift the conversation into being about that doctor's unruly sexual desires - and penis, always the Freudian penis. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The distinguishing element between patient and friend is who you spank. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Freud gave great advice to people under mental duress: simply, suppress your feelings and leave me out of it. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

All astute scientists know that temperature is actually something like a physical object in motion, and so it can be measured in terms of velocity; it's not, however, rightly measured in degrees according to the appropriate scale, e.g. Kelvin. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A scientist from India is actually a Bright American Scientist, and only American Science can detect and report a global phenomenon. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

A room full of computer equipment can be kept cool by plain old fans, despite the intense heat. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The Earth can get hit with the biggest solar flare ever, and it won't cause extensive worldwide damage to every electrical grid and satellite. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

A massive jet struggling to gain altitude and speed after takeoff won't go into a stall when forced into a steep low-speed climb. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Toxic, stifling ashclouds won't really affect a jet's engines, even if you fly over an island-state that's now one giant smoking volcano. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A wave's impact can be determined down to the exact second of arrival. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Cockpits are very explosive, so they tend to explode violently when a jet with no fuel crashes. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The cat always knows too much; it must be taken care of. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Some moves are still cool and overwhelmingly effective even when you don't have knives. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Age old techniques that kill with a single touch take some time to kick in. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

All shaman return to the sky . . . while on LSD in a helicopter. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Kids love product placement, especially when it's secretly broadcast as something fun and exciting! link
Rating: -1 (+0/-1)

Every household needs the soft glow of electric sex in the front window. link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

Russians might be interested in the raw shit. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The most suitable CIA methods involve leaving something alone until it makes sense. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Cheaters don't take cheating very well. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

It's alright to phone and ask a person if he's concerned with his shit. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Drinking then driving can be made much better by also stargazing at the same time. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

You don't have to pay attention to what's in front of you when you've stopped at a crosswalk, just as long as you're having a tender moment with your family. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

One day you're a potential MIT student, the next you've got ink done and you rollin' wit a crew in jail...or at least, your half-witted sibling will think so. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The most significant event in human history should be reduced to an online contest, won by whoever writes 500 damn words. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

It's possible for the Sun to illuminate the side of a planet not facing it, while the side in the sunlight remains dark. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

You can find the address and photograph of someone's house on the internet. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The first step in atonement: the evening stalk and stare. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

America has door to door trial maid services. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Old men are always full of deep philosophical knowledge. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Cloud patterns on Earth 2 never change. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Fall in love with whatever drives you crazy. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Ladies love a man who can play the saw. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Confess only after you've set up some poor soul to take a terrible, heartwrenching fall! link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Pin all your hopes on a highly speculative theory based on no evidence at all. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A planet identical to Earth can come very close to our own planet without affecting either one in the form of massive tidal effects. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Bio-clocks come with neat Timex Indiglo functions. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The best economic systems are the ones that allow theft as easily as pretty much shaking someone's hand. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Time is money and life, but gangsters will still give you a moment before they rob you. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

There's more than one way to drink your life away. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Running like hell for 1 hour 30 minutes is preferable than riding the bus as far as you possibly can. link
Rating: 1 (+2/-1)

When you've been giving a wealth of time, don't bother meeting up with someone early who might really need it, too. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Ghetto folks know how to run fast. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Rich girls always fall for the potentially dangerous outsider with a secret. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Even though your car is topless and no one is wearing a seatbelt, you can flip it off an embankment without getting thrown from it and killed. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When you stop aging at 25, your haircut never changes as well. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Wealthy people are evil capitalists who always cut shady deals. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Gangsters won't shoot you with guns they don't have; it's perfectly safe to turn your back on them! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A large group of security guards won't alert more security or cops when you abduct a millionaire inside his own building. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The safest monetary systems are ones that don't have fail-safes or security systems in case they get stolen - especially if the item is worth a million! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

No shot of deep space is complete without a camera flare, like a film crew was actually in space. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A lengthy music video for one of Wagner's operas can also serve as a film's intro. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

It's ponderous and moves slowly - no, not the limo driving up the path or the planet moving towards Earth, but the film itself. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

One parent must be a free-spirit, while the other has to be an abrasive downer. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The best way to handle an unwanted in-law: stfu & gtfo. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

High price wedding planners are master artisans whose works are to be adored, i.e. they're not pretentious jerks. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When someone shows signs of emotional problems, everyone should pitch in to make those problems worse! link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

From the previous evening to the following early morning, certain constellations can seemingly remain high in the sky. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Planets of doom must be named appropriately, and not something like Triumphant Wonder Planet of Amazing Fun. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

There are scientists, and there are real scientists who are really right. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Meatloaf isn't a happy meal. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

We're alone in the universe because of some bottle of beans. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Nothing's wrong at all, especially when someone's silently scribbling notes and looking grimly up at the sky. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Not only does a magic cave look like a teepee, it's also pretty much useless as protection. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Despite how small the Earth is, it can capture a considerably larger rogue planet as it passes by - even when the Sun couldn't capture it! link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

You can freely walk out of an FBI disciplinary hearing only after you've done something witty and cutting. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Even though an extraordinary amount of snow collapsed on it, blankets of snow won't follow and crush you after you've slid off the side of a gigantic UFO. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

No evacuation scene is complete without the following: smoke/steam billowing everywhere, sparks flying, water dripping, and people clinging desperately to ladders! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Finding one person among hundreds of others won't take very long at all. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Grabbing a ledge with one hand isn't that difficult to do, no matter how fast or how far you slid before reaching it. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Interiors of aliens spacecraft are always dark and grimy, with only one color of light. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The view through binoculars always looks like two conjoined circles. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Death is certain after an elaborate scheme is told. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

People who are wanted by various powerful organizations like to skulk around in the local bars and alleys. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

People guarding rooms always fall for the ol' switcheroo! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

It's hard to shoot someone at point-blank range. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Top secret black helicopters aren't equipped with night vision or thermal imaging for night searches. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The best directions are always the vaguest: "They went that way", and point in that general direction. You'll always find what you were looking for. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Burning a plain old stick works reliably like a torch. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When standing in a weird fluid, make no attempt to step away from it. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Impossible scenarios are always meant to become possible. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

FBI agents tend to joke about finding bombs, so don't immediately believe your partner when he said he found one. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Even though it's risky to use cellphones next to a bomb, go ahead and phone your partner who's next to a bomb, rather than yelling at him through the door! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Bombs always have countdown-clocks, even when bombs are well-hidden indicating that they weren't meant to be found. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Blowing off the front of a building won't leave much of a debris cloud. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Men like to chat with one another while peeing. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Guards can always be fooled by using Jedi mindtricks. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When your place is being searched, the best place to hide is in some alley a couple of feet away from your place - and make sure to peek out once in a while! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

FEMA is a powerful secret government. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The most reliable way to dispose of bodies is by blowing up a building and getting the FBI involved, setting off a convoluted chain of events. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Aliens like getting needles, so go ahead and walk right up to the little fella! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)