Physical excersise is the key to happiness. And I thought that the key to happiness was doing what you love. Shows how much I know. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Blondes know how to have the most fun. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Sesame Street isn't evil. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The Thinker statue loads slower than DSL. I didn't know that was possible. link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

Even ancient wax pharoahs have idols. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Evil Rulers have to dramatically state that they came back to life more than once. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

You can tell you're desperate when the way you get the girl you like's attention is by beating her on the head with a club. She'll totally love you now. link
Rating: -1 (+0/-1)

Yes, in South America, it is possible for dogs to somehow know how to fly a plane. Just don't tell them there's a squirrl nearby. link
Rating: 0 (+4/-4)

The easiest way to open a lock is by playing Roses Are Red on DDR for about a good 10 seconds, and hope that you don't fail. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

If you buy a Hummer, check to see if there are a few things: 1) a random guy wearing black on the bottom who is somehow still on 2) a bunch of pointy things that fly out of the sides at the push of a button and 3) a spiky plow on the front for getting down the highway. I wonder if it's a hybrid. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

As a little side note: You should never tell another guy - who may or may not be a werewolf - that you love him right in front of a vampire who can kill you at any second. Especially when you love the vampire too. link
Rating: 3 (+6/-3)