Only that one bird can explode acid everywhere. He had a condition. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Michael Bay is a 12 year old. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Even though the man killed Uncle Ben by accident, screw responsibility and just go out on a revenge quest. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Your lawyer might have ways of defending you in trial for a case in which you shot your wife in the face 6 times for changing the channel on your ball game. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Don't go in the attic. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Women will go a long way for a practical joke. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Hope that decades later a terrible indie filmmaker doesn't try to "modernize" your classic film of suspense and shock and turn it into a complete joke. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Don't bother calling for a bus or staying put in the school. Just tell the children to run like hell. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Kids in the 60's really loved school. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

It's the end of the world. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Melanie would rather keep her high heels on even though she's being chased by thousands of psychotic birds. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Jaws went from a classic Spielberg film of A-class suspense and outstanding quality to Friday the 13th with a shark. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Vampire babies look like CGI. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Take a classic film by one of the greatest filmmakers, Steven Spielberg and turn it into a dumb Friday the 13th premise. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Kids these days love 80's video game references. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Dogs judge people and other dogs strictly by appearance. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Take one of the greatest action films ever made, take what made it great, and rape it. Rape it to death. Take the realism of the first three movies and just rape it. People are stupid, right? They won't know the difference. Just slap Die Hard on the title. They won't mind. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Die Hard has officially been "dumbed down" for a wider audience. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

When you turn 60 years old you become superhuman. What made the first film great was he was NOT superhuman. He was the everyman, but still awesome. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

It's safe to celebrate a million dollar sale you made even though you gave your consumer a 50% discount. Your company just lost 500,000 dollars you idiot. Stop dancing! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

All bad movies start out with a long and dragged out driving sequence with nothing happening. Think about it. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

If you're going to focus the entire first half of your movie on nothing but what appears to be character development, it would be useful if your characters even had souls. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Did Alfred Hitchcock need CGI birds? I don't think so. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Coat hangers.....(sigh) link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

What's that? I can't hear you. Your environmental message with complete lack of subtlety wasn't shoved down my throat hard enough. Try about 11 more times with a hippie this time. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Little patches of CGI flames that don't seem to spread at all is enough to make you cough like you just smoked a whole carton of cigarettes. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Birds can fly in place. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Even action heroes can break down into tears. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Leave it to Michael Bay and his army of hacks to ruin your classic independent film decades later. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A remake can throw out all the disturbing horror from the original and just replace it with slasher style kills. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

You can be so old that your skin will be light green. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

After seeing this you'll want to skip a few meals. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The original was proof that you don't need slasher style kills, extreme blood, and gore to make a movie about a guy with a chainsaw scary and disturbing. All you need is good acting and a director with actual talent for capturing truly disturbing horror. Then the remake threw all that out the window. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

When you make a true classic horror film that relies on actual disturbing horror and not slasher style over the top kills and cheap gimmicks, someone is going to turn it into the complete opposite in 2003 and beyond. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Aliens believe they can wipe out the human race with 3 noncontagious zombies. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The best way to taunt your enemies is to send them the corpse of one of your enemies henchmen with a message on them in blood stating that you have a weapon and close it with Santa Clause's famous battle cry. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Take away Deadpool's mouth. Fans won't mind. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Cyclops was about 16 or 17 years old in 1979 and the original trilogy is supposed to take place in the "not too distant future." He would have been about 50 years old in the first movie. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Bad guys have terrible aim. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Michael Bay is a 14 year old boy. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

When people fall off skyscrapers their arms get unusually long. Am I the only one that noticed that? link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The very second after your boss yells "You're Fired", it's official. You are automatically wiped from the system and Robocop would then have the freedom to kill you. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Anything that's incredibly stupid these days will be loved by teenaged girls everywhere. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

What did I learn from watching this? Not to watch it. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Loki is a puny - Oh wait wrong movie link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Name your son after an Ed Wood movie. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A movie that makes fun of Adam Sandler isn't aware that the movie itself is just like an Adam Sandler movie. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Jet-packs and machine guns go good with Elvis . link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A movie can get very confused on whether it wants to be a dark comedy, a realistic take on superheros, or a satire of over-the-top Quentin Tarantino action films. This movie is good and everything, but it feels like it has ADD at points. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Take "Close Encounters of the Third Kind" and Jeff Goldblum's "The Fly", put it in a blender, and you have "District 9" link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Michael Myers is the human version of Jaws for he has a looping tune every time he shows up. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

All high-school boys are bullies. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

High School boys imagine their dream girl eating strawberrys in a sunny field of flowers. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Satan has a mouth, but it never moves when he talks. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Acting like a monkey is a human fighting style. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

No Bonesaw?! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Cinderella is supposed to be an outcast, yet in every imagining, she is always fairly attractive looking. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Every fu**ing movie in the world will be remade whether it's necessary or not. 10 years from now we'll be seeing a Paranormal Activity remake. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

We never get to see an alien. There I just saved you 2 hours. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

No matter how updated a superhero movie is, the reason they chose to wear tights will never be fully explained. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

This movie's version of Flash Thompson apparently has mental problems. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

A 400-pound man can die of something other than a heart attack. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Graveyards are always foggy. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

When a zombie very, very, very, slowly approaches you, don't run. All hope is lost. Just stay where you are and scream even though it's night time where they are and day time where you are. link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

Old men are buried with Dracula capes. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Electrode guns can jam. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Aliens speak English with American accents, yet they have goofy sounding names. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Popeye can't help but mumble about everything he sees. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When you do something great and heroic, the people around you will sing your theme song. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Violence solves everything. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Everything is food link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

No one will help Wimpy with his strange hamburger fetish. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The good witch will protect you by making you the wicked witch's main target by giving you the one thing she's after and tell her you have it. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The bell is out of order even though it was clearly working just fine. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The best way to get apples is to make faces at trees. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

You'll know you have a heart when it breaks. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The wizard is a good man even though he acted like an asshole for no apparent reason and sent a little girl to assassinate a witch and bring proof and refused to help her get back home when she did, but he's really a good man. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

If you need to get home the good witch will give the most dangerous route home and just tell you the easy way home that only takes a few seconds after you already made it through the hard way. Biggest plot hole in movie history, I think. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The reason our dolls could never talk when we were kids was because we never threatened to throw them in the fire place. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

People in the 50s freely waved their pistols around with their finger on the trigger, pointing it at everything they see, and would often scratch their heads with the barrel. link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

The ruler of the universe sits in a little office desk. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Tombstones are knocked over easily. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Sometimes God would flicker the sun on and off. link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

In the military your officer will very casually tell you about a U.F.O invasion that he's supposed to keep secret by order of the government, but don't tell. It's a secret. link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

U.F.Os actually have strings attached to them. link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

Film-making isn't about the tiny details. It's about the big picture. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Flying Saucers are shaped like huge cigars. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Our stupid minds are STUPID! STUPID!! link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

The more time you spend in your doll body, the more human you become, but you can still survive getting shot in the chest, being fully on fire, and decapitated. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The Terminator 2 of monster movie sequels. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Animated Popeye believes he is in the wrong movie. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When people are frozen in time, you can see them move around a little bit and occasionally blink. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

FUCK THE REMAKE link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

This movie could have been called "Rock'em Sock'em Robots" link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Voodoo is the true religion. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

WE HATE YOU HUMANS SO MUCH WE ARE GOING TO DROWN EVERY HUMAN ON EARTH!! What? Oh, you love your wife? Well, fine we won't kill all the humans after all. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Before people are unexpectedly murdered they coincidentally leave a dramatic voice-mail. link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

Comic book writers from the 1960s know that if you are bitten by a radioactive spider you have super human strength, super senses, super reflexes, super agility, and can stick to walls, but shooting webs from your wrists is just bullshit. link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

Hearing Spider-Man yell "CROTCH!" is worth the price of admission. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Dr. Octopus used to venture with Indy until he got spiked. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)