Gib is tired of being in the van. He's been in the van for 15 years. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

JCVD is able to alter the rules of Grammer. Normally "A" goes in front of a word starting with a consonant (ex: a box). And, normally "AN" goes in front of a word starting with vowel (ex: AN APPLE). But, JCVD wants thousands of items to start with AN. AN box, AN boat, AN soldier, etc. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When the woman you are making out with suddenly sees that you are a disgusting alien, simply ask her "hey baby, what's wrong?" link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

When you are The Thing, you should be the first to say "You've gotta be f&#^ing kidding" when a piece of you sprouts legs from its head. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

If you are from the future, with specific knowledge of how the entire planet of Romulus is to be destroyed in nearly 100 years, you should really keep that to yourself and let the future unfold exactly the same way. Otherwise, you would never get sucked into the black hole with Nero. So, yeah, keep that genocide secret to yourself. link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

In the future, things will be much easier. Open Heart Surgery? Let's do it in a tent in the desert with no meds or blood. Helicopter crashes? Pfft, no biggie! Walking through AN ENTIRE FACTORY OF KILLER MACHINES? Not a problem, only one of those machines will be working. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

In a machine factory, made by machines, housing only machines at a non-human controlled HQ, you will STILL need chairs, keyboards, elevators and stairs! link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)