It's a real system shock when you find out that his English "sister" is actually his Japanese fiancee. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Samurai lose to guns just as easily as they lose to stone arrowheads. Samurai suck! link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Minnie Driver has a very distinctive laugh. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Guns kill gods. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Everyone is an asshole in one way or another. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

EVERYBODY knows how to play "Heart and Soul" on the piano. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Asian schoolgirls were kicking the crap out of bad guys even in the '70s. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

It's totally not creepy to make a bellybutton charm out of the bullet that killed your lover. Not creepy in the slightest. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

If you get fooled into shooting a TV image of someone, you'll feel like a total retard. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

A midget with a gun and a bag of peanuts is pretty original. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Don't take your eyes off your opponent when you bow to him. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Throwing rocks is a worthwhile lifelong skill. link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

True romantics can passionately kiss a princess while holding a mouthful of poison without swallowing it. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Disemboweled folks can still shout a wee nasty earful if they try. link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

Mel Gibson hates the English. link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

Some men are longer than others. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

The Battle of Stirling BRIDGE was evidently misnamed. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

You need to be good at math to become a pilot. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Mormons will trigger the potential end of mankind. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

You can gain a man's knowledge and secrets by sucking out his brains. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

It's totally cool for a corporal to sleep with his squad leader. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

In the future, our parents will force us to go to Harvard against our wishes. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Space Arachnids have 4 legs. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Dizzy Flores makes for a nice looking girl. Much nicer than she was in the book, where she was a man who died in Johnny's arms. link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

Yes, as a matter of fact, I would like to know more. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Football plays work in warfare. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

The trade-off for us becoming a militaristic fascist state in the future where not all civilians are citizens: we'll all have beautiful hair. link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

Look, it's Don Cheadle. He's here. Deal with it. Let's move on. link
Rating: -2 (+0/-2)

Ivan Vanko can build things with a box of scraps too. Cave notwithstanding. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Losers always whine about their best. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The Maxim Machine-gun is super effective against retreating friendly soldiers. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

It REALLY sucks to be the standard bearer in a modern war. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The Mauser K98 and the Russian Mosin-Nagant were upgraded into instantaneous-impact laser guns in the 1940s. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

It worked for Conan, and it worked for Jaguar Paw; we as a people today need to use more swinging spike traps against people we dislike. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

People afraid of stitches need to remember that we could be using the jaws of decapitated insects to hold their cuts closed instead. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Nobody knows what the hell she wanted him to do to her stockings. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

"Ibn" means "son of". link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Vikings can laugh about anything and everything. They're very cheerful in that sense. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When learning a new language, "pig-eating son of a whore" should always be one of the first things you learn. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Don't walk in front of an archer. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Poison is a weapon for girls. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If you plan to kill someone just to make a point, it's courteous to pay for his funeral. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Don't fall in love with someone else's woman. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When given the choice of fighting a dragon or hundreds of mounted warriors with torches, sometimes the dragon is the one you'd rather fight. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

You can defeat an entire army of beastmen by killing their mother and their general. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

In Scandinavia, it is socially acceptable to clean your face with another man's backwash. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

More engineering disputes need to end in sword duels. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

"Entertain us" has "anus" in it. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Mead is an excellent loophole for drinking prohibitions. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Only an Arab would bring a dog to war. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Vikings understand Latin far better than they do Greek. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The Norse are in need of many gods, but they will still pray to all of them for your safe journey. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Kings learn to read and write quicker than common folk. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If you cannot lift something, simply grow stronger. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Give an Arab a sword and he'll make a knife. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Cow urine, boiled down, is great for cuts. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Scandinavia looks deceptively similar to the Pacific coast of British Columbia. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

You hunt bears by going into their caves with spears. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A person, even a prince, will never live it down if he's famous for killing his own brother. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

13 is a lucky number for Vikings. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Don't get grossed out if a girl puts cow pee on your face, for she will probably sleep with you later. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

It's far easier to appreciate a Beowulf story if the hero isn't jumping around the mead hall naked. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Arabian ambassadors don't need Rosetta Stone software to learn new languages. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Rocks in your shoes can inadvertently save lives. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Bombed out coffee shops don't have a lot of coffee left over. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

You sleep easier with a clear conscience. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Medics are understandably upset when the people whose bleeding they've just staunched suddenly end up with a bullet in their brains. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

20 millimeters sounds like nothing, but it's still more than enough to make a person's head disappear. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

It'd be a pain in the ass to be a left-handed soldier working a right-handed rifle bolt. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Sometimes it's not such a horrible idea to just help your aunt with chores around the house. Just saying. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

It is possible for little children and kamikaze pilots to all fall under the same metaphor. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Fireflies are weak! Even little baby girl can squish! link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

To this day, no one really knows who actually bombed the home islands of Japan. That, or they just prefer not to talk about it. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Boys that have seen their entire homes firebombed to ash can still remarkably be surprised when they learn their nation has surrendered. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Frogs are actually quite tasty when that's all you have. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Serenity does not appear in this film. In all meanings of that sentence. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Malnutrition: the silent killer. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Don't eat from a dead boy's candy tin. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Spousal rape is okay, because they'll be smiling in the morning. link
Rating: 3 (+3/-0)

It really, really sucks to die at the muzzles of your own weapons. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The Zulus have very impressive top tenors. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

"Men of Harlech" makes for a rather impressive battle chant. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Modern soldiers use their entrenching tools for everything; back in the 19th century, the bayonet WAS the entrenching tool. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Welsh Regiments in 1879 were privy to both Lee-Enfield bolt-action rifles and the time machines they must have used to acquire said-futuristic weapons. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Real men take cover behind walls of mealie bags. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Even in the 1870s, white people were already afraid of black guys with guns. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Standard Zulu Impi equipment: cowhide shield, iklwa spear, 1960s wristwatch. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The British soldier is a bloody beast with a bayonet. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If someone was given character development, he most likely won the Victoria Cross at some point in life. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

It feels really good when your enemy surrenders the battle by singing to you. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Some would call going to battle in parade dress silly; others shall call it badass. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Colonialism used to be a fun adventure. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Michael Caine used to be young. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Blood pooling in your shirt as you lay dying will take on a pink, watery consistency. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Pistols are especially accurate when you're diving into a roll and there are four enemies standing on a hill across from you. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

People don't always die after they take poison. Forget that, and the future can get complicated. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Foot is rock, shadow is paper, firefly-butt is scissors. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Blind bicentenarian voodoo ladies are remarkably spry. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Modern day aristocrats have no marketable skills. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Misunderstand the moral of the story, and folks'll stop wanting to sing and dance with you. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)