A cottage in the middle of the woods was refered to as a "keep" in the 1800s. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

One-man Russian roulette didn't quite work in the 1800s. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The bad guy won't get even slightly suspicious when you're running along and suddenly do a random jump whilst on seemingly flat ground. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Knowing that the main character will survive all the way through the film (due to his descendant reading his journal) takes the edge off a bit. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When screaming to purposefully gather zombies, you only start to realise that you've not left yourself an exit when you are surrounded. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

It is possible to make a banjo sound creepy. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Some good guys are prepared to listen to what any bad guys have to say...with the exception of the doctor. Always shoot the doctor before asking any questions. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

The only natural thing to do with a zombie you've caught is tie it to a pole and then tease it by occassionally getting close to it. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Apparently a meteor that is "one week early" will still hit Earth. A week early to its collison point would mean that it would miss the Earth entirely as it is still several hundred thousand miles away from that point. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Insurance salesmen won't let the end of the world prevent them from going into work. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Overly happy people can be exceedingly annoying. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

If a loud hoover, several shouts, etc, don't wake the girl on your sofa up, just play the harmonica. link
Rating: -1 (+0/-1)

If the end of the world does ever come, the cleaners will be the last people to find out. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

When you're asleep in the middle of a park, people will just leave their dogs with you. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Some ex-boyfriends deserve to be left in the middle of a riot. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Even in an end of the world situation, two men taking a piss together is still not a comfortable situation. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Security guards won't shower despite how sweaty they get before putting their uniform on. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

You've just slit your wrists, the only natural thing to do next is to rummage under your son's bed. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Instead of just using the drag option to return to the beginning of the DVD on a laptop, some people will just put it on rewind and wait. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A mentally challenged man won't find it at all strange that his doctor is fondling his leg. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Despite an entire room just watching you turn from male to female, everyone will act as though you were male all the way through, even the ones your female alter ego had sex with. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

You've reached down and felt a vagina between your legs, but you will refuse to believe you're turning into a woman until your hair grows. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Despite your gender changing and the body sizes being considerably different, no clothes will stretch or break, even extremely tight lingerie. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Stephen Tobolowsky thinks that breasts disappearing is a sign that a woman is not in the mood for sex. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A homosexual man will threaten to take legal action against his lawyer if he becomes attracted to a woman. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

If you're a woman coming out of the shower, never ask the man who has stood there staring if he will hand you a towel or continue to stand there looking, the answer is obvious. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Make-up doesn't cover a full mustache. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Why hide your clothes when you can put them through a paper-shreader? link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Despite being the end of the world, Alice will find time to change her hairstyle and colour on a regular basis. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Infection normally takes hold within an hour or two, unless you're one of the main secondary characters, in which case it takes several days. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

A very old fence will be strong enough to keep out several thousand zombies. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Despite having difficulties controlling just one zombie, Umbrella will have no problem dressing several in overalls. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

In a world where usable water is a luxury and will only be used for drinking 99% of the time, everyone is clean. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

The name may be the same but a movie character has nothing else in common with the character from the game. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Even in a hot desert Alice will still wear a big-ass coat. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Muscle and bone rot doesn't impact the speed of animals, but does humans. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

When asked to present a photography/art project, the teacher will be offended if you've done something creative and different. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

It will take someone falling into it before anyone notices that there's a dead dog in the middle of a hockey pitch. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

If a guy with a greenhouse full of weed and other drugs tells you that something will definitely be a cure, ignore him; every cure he suggests will fail. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Just because something is said to be a cure in the first movie, doesn't mean that it will be by the time the second movie comes around. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

An overly happy mother will have two emo daughters. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Suicides should be more than cheap entertainment. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Suicide is the ultimate fuck you. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Nothing pleases a mother more than when her daughter has her first period. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Despite suspecting that your alcoholic ex has taken your child, it will take you 3 days to get to a bar. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Carbon monoxide poisoning does not apply in a horror movie when running a generator constantly. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

It will take until your generator is near enough broke to think "erm, maybe we should turn off stuff like the jukebox." link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Hayden will only help small children, but will completely ignore someone on a push-bike that is desperate for help. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Only one place in an entire city will have a back up generator. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

You can be safe by putting a glow-in-the-dark ring around your neck that barely glows, but moonlight does nothing to help you. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

You can be taken by the shadow people, who leave your clothes behind, but they will put your clothes back on for you once you return just outside of a bus stop. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Some characters can only be briefly touched by the dark to be taken, others can be in darkness for several seconds and be perfectly fine. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Never trust a cancer patient to drive your car when you know he has no license. link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

A painting that looks like a standby button on a remote control is considered "art." link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

Seth Rogen is louder on the phone across the office than the audio you're listening to through headphones. link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

The natural first reaction to your son telling you he has cancer is to make him a cup of tea. link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

No-one wants to fuck someone who looks like Voldemort. link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

Doctors have no problem giving a diagnosis about the patient on a dictaphone in front of the patient, all before actually talking to the patient. link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

Finding out Patrick Swayze is dead can ruin your day. link
Rating: 0 (+1/-1)

Always look around for cotton buds before applying a cream/gel with your fingers into a wound. link
Rating: -1 (+0/-1)

The best way to win fights is to let your opponent beat the crap out of you for 95% of it and then repeat the same move over and over again. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

High school principles will refuse anything until they personally get excited about it. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Moby Dick is a must for recovering alcoholics and born-again Christians. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Kurt Angle doesn't need to say anything to be able to kick your ass. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Jesus will be down at the mill forgiving all the drunks rather than helping people with cancer. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

You can tell how much medication someone has just by listening to them as they enter the room. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

The way to reunite your family and solve all your financial problems is to enter a fighting tournament...turns out violence does solve some things. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

MMA tournaments end like all Disney films.....the underdog wins. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Bone is a good colour for business cards. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

People in the 1980s left quotes from the Terminator on the end of their answering machine messages. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Not reading the specials is a good way to keep your spleen. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Ed Gein said two things about women. One part wants to take her out, talk to her, be real nice and sweet and treat her right....the other wants to see what her head would look like on a stick. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

"I have to return some video tapes" is always a good excuse. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Texas Chainsaw Massacre is a good work out video. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

You can be an extremely wealthy and well respected member of your company without actually appearing to do any work. link
Rating: 2 (+2/-0)

Cops get easily upset when you say you don't like the CD they just bought. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Being a closet homosexual who did cocaine is an obvious sign you went to Yale. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Tom Cruise has the patience of a saint. Anyone else would shoot those two kids for being so damn annoying....especially Dakota Fanning. link
Rating: 4 (+4/-0)

Sometimes a shit film will have an awesome soundtrack that it doesn't deserve. link
Rating: -1 (+1/-2)

A character can have a scar that's shown several times and even questioned by that character, but it will never be explained. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

When Paul Anderson creates a film based on a video game and then gets criticized for it only vaguely being similar, he will claim it's a prequel. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Killing one zombie dog on it's own is difficult, killing several at the same time is a piece of cake. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

A vampire film will have a redone version of a rap song at the end and it'll be far, far better than the original. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Vampires can have houses that make a lot of noise when you're walking through them, but a vampire will only know you're there by smell. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Christopher Mintz-Plasse will always be typecast as a social outcast. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Never piss off a Mexican if he has access to your mini-army's most dangerous vehicle. link
Rating: -1 (+0/-1)

There's a zombie attack going on at your base and you're in a look out post that's 20 feet above the ground that the zombies can't get to....first thing to do.....get down...what's the worst that could happen? link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Much like the rest of society, a zombie's fascination with fireworks will very quickly disappear. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

There's no such thing as nice shooting. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

There are 50,000 cars in Samoa and every single one of them is stolen. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Dennis Hopper will fake a zombie attack and someone when he realizes he said something he shouldn't have said. link
Rating: -1 (+0/-1)

If you're ever turned into a zombie, let the big one do all the work, don't actually do anything yourself other than eat the occasional person. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A 5 feet journey from one side of a shed to another is too far for a person with a skateboard to walk. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

Don't tease the dead or one of them will force you to accidentally smash your head on a gravestone. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

Never piss off everyone else in the house because one of two things will bite you, a zombie or a bullet. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)

A zombie can approach you in a graveyard wearing a suit and looking like anyone else would facially; it's only when the suit falls off that he goes bat-shit crazy. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The law of sod applies when looking for keys; you only find them when they're no longer useful. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

It is actually possible to watch a zombie movie that doesn't have Tom Savini on screen once. link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

The only logical choice when your keys don't fit the lock is to shoot it with a shotgun. What's the worst that could happen? link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0)

When there's a great window of opportunity to leave, don't take it; leave yourself trapped in a house. link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0)