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When you're trying to get a girl to see that you're interested in her, don't look directly at her, and respond to text messages from other people while she's talking to you. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Chronicle
You can throw cops and SWAT guys around with telekinesis as much as you want, as long as you don't draw a weapon they won't shoot you. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Chronicle
A firefighter's suit actually does not protect you from fire. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Chronicle
You can totally go about the rest of your schoolday like nothing happened after ripping out someone's teeth in front of a bunch of witnesses. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Chronicle
If you fail to land a punch, you should fly out the nearest window to acknowledge your defeat. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Chronicle
Andrew waits until just after Matt arrives at the hospital before dropping his father, rather than dropping him immediately while there's noone around to save him. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Chronicle
Raves are filled with jealous and violent boyfriends. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Chronicle
Cheerleaders are creeped out by video cameras, not by creepy people staring at them. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Chronicle
The best way to convince the President that you're not a threat is to enter his mind and stare silently at him. Heck, even make it storm outside and make the power go out in his Oval Office. Oh, and for good measure, bring along the mutant who tried to assassinate him. If that won't convince him that you're not a threat, I just don't know what will! ~ KungFuMasterLarry @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | X2: X-Men United
The mullet is making a comeback. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
The reporter's portable camcorder is magical. It can do full motion 12 megapixel video and it can also see around things while staying in one place.
~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
When someone is having a heart attack, leave your small child to babysit the dying person while you go get help.
~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
The light from heaven is kept in a box in an asian antique shop.
~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
The Koreans had surface to surface missiles 500 years ago.
~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
The flashback contains a flashback.
~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
News reporters are allowed to roam around the police station taking pictures of anything they want.
~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
Football players are rapists.
~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
Do not be rude to a black nurse or else you'll be killed by a dragon.
~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
Los Angeles has only 1 pair of detectives.
~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
A dragon tattoo can be mistaken for an infectious disease.
~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
If you collapse from being shot, usually it goes away after a few seconds and you can get back up.
~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
When you're trying to shoot someone and they hold up a shield, try shooting them somewhere that isn't covered by the shield.
~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
Yeah real good, leave the black guy who got electro-punched by Spawn to die on the side of the road. "I'm sure Bruce is fine." ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
American audiences cannot get enough of the shape-shifting cgi gimmick from 1996. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/06/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Dragon Wars
When a non-magical being is bringing you and 100 of your magical friends to be locked away in the dungeon, you just follow him without causing any problems. ~ 1stoffendment @ 02/05/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2
No matter how many time you slam your head into incredibly hard objects no concussion will occur if your Tom Cruise. ~ foggyfroggy @ 02/05/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol
Your uncle, who you didn't really hang out with, leaving you a house in the woods that has glass walls everywhere is probably fine, move right in. ~ tina270 @ 02/05/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | 13 Ghosts
try to shoot selene while she is getting on an elevator, not only will it not affect her at all, but it won't harm her suit and you'll just make her angry. ~ tina270 @ 02/05/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Underworld: Awakening
You blew up the infidels Mercedes. That was my Mercedes. ~ john2012 @ 02/05/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | An American Carol
Gee I wonder who they are making fun of in this movie ~ john2012 @ 02/05/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | An American Carol
"Abe Lincoln decided not to fight the civil war and now you are the biggest slave owner in Alabama" ~ john2012 @ 02/05/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | An American Carol
Show America how much you love it by banning the 4th of July ~ john2012 @ 02/05/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | An American Carol
All Hitler needed was some Carbon Credits ~ john2012 @ 02/05/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | An American Carol
It is nice to see Documentarians still making moves about Slavery, the Nazi, the French Revolution instead of things that actually matter in today's world. ~ john2012 @ 02/05/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | An American Carol
"I Have always been a big supporter of Gay rights." SLAP "I'm the Ghost of Christmas Future you Idiot." ~ john2012 @ 02/05/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | An American Carol
Go see a movie called "Fat Head" Totally disses Super Size Me. ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Super Size Me
I wonder what would have happened if he ate a Yogurt Parfait for breakfast, had a salad for lunch and a small hamburger and diet coke for dinner. It is called a menu stupid. ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Super Size Me
I have never met anyone who was forced to eat at McDonalds. ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Super Size Me
When making a movie based on a video game maybe you should make it look like the video game. ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Super Mario Brothers
When you have actors the quality of Dennis Hopper and Bob Hoskins maybe you should write them a script worthy of their talent. ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Super Mario Brothers
This movie is perfect for Jon Legquizamo's talent ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Super Mario Brothers
Don't end a movie on a cliff hanger if you cant make a sequel. ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Super Mario Brothers
Maybe the producer, director and writers should have actually played Super Mario Brothers before making the movie. ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Super Mario Brothers
Still waiting for for a Zelda movie where Link does not go after his girl friend. ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Super Mario Brothers
Should have used the guys from the Mario Brothers TV Show. ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Super Mario Brothers
sorry mario a good movie is in another script. ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Super Mario Brothers
Movies make bad video games. Video Games make bad movies. Super Mario Brothers, Doom, Street Fighter, Mortal Kombat Annilation, Final Fantasy, Resident Evil.... ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Super Mario Brothers
life day still sucks in 3d ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
Jake Lloyd is an even worse actor in 3d ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
Jar-Jar Binks is even more annoying in 3D ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
Padme Amidala is even more wooden in 3D ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
C-3PO is even more of a wuss in 3D ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
Darth Maul is even cooler in 3D ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
Mace Windu is even badder in 3D ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
The Premise of this movie still sucks in 3D ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
Everyone still dies by being thrown down a reactor shaft in 3D ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
This movie is even more racist and offensive in 3D ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
George Lucas please stop. Please please stop. If only for the sake of the children everywhere ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
Obi-Wan is still to late to save Qui-Gon in 3D ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
Any planet that elects a 14 year old girl to run it deserves to be conquered, in 3D ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
George Lucas is considering releasing Howard the Duck, in 3D ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
Phantom Menace is Ok. Howard the Duck is Ok. Willow is Ok. The Star Wars Christmas special, no way. Maybe he will release the Star Wars Christmas Special, in 3D ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 3D
Take the only Marines and Sergeant with any real successful combat experience against your enemy and send them back into battle instead of having them teach the rest of the Marines how to fight and win. ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Battle: Los Angeles
Kate Beckinsale in Leather. Do you need another reason to see this movie. ~ john2012 @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Underworld: Awakening
When $5 million dollars is at stake, be sure to write down your crime on paper where of course people will find it and no where you are and what you're up to. ~ Isabella @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Twins
As far as virgins go, 12-year-old with a nun is a lot of pressure. ~ Isabella @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Twins
If you want to visit someone in jail, be sure to get a pass before 6:45 p.m. No visitors after 7 p.m. ~ Isabella @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Twins
Nothing spruce's up a small-time crook's living room like a lonesome rubber tire. ~ Isabella @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Twins
It's perfectly natural to take a band's guitar and smash it without their permission if it means saving your girl. ~ Isabella @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Twins
Bottle rockets blow up windows just as good as pyrotechnics. ~ Isabella @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Twins
230 pound virgins are embarrassed to be caught reading nudie magazines. ~ Isabella @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Twins
When your convertible lands a two-wheelie, of course your car will still work. ~ Isabella @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Twins
If you really wanna romance a girl, you waltz with her. ~ Isabella @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Twins
Women are likely to forgive you if you offer them coffee. ~ Isabella @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Twins
Poor people willingly accept half-eaten hotdogs. ~ Isabella @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Twins
To be smart, read books like Miracle Protein, First Aid, and Health - but have them buried under books with no titles. ~ Isabella @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Twins
It's ok to smoke in a greenhouse if you're a professor. ~ Isabella @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Twins
The witch will also curse the servants including children for something the prince did. She seems like she needs to learn not to be a jerk. ~ broham @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 1 (+1/-0) | Beauty and the Beast
Not one person in a nightclub full of hundreds will notice the strange sight of a man hanging from the ceiling then dropping down like he's Spider-Man. ~ KungFuMasterLarry @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Fright Night (2011)
Harry is tired of all these motha-effing squids in this motha-effing ocean. ~ NateSean @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Sphere
When your husband is beaten and mugged by a couple of gun-wielding lowlifes who specifically tell you not to scream, promptly scream at the top of your lungs anyway. ~ KungFuMasterLarry @ 02/04/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Batman
Elrond really loses his way come World War II. ~ SilverAG @ 02/03/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Captain America: The First Avenger
If your doctor is completely insensitive and acts like your cancer diagnoses is no big deal, you keep going to him. ~ SilverAG @ 02/03/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | 50/50
It's completely acceptable for a therapist to date a patient. ~ SilverAG @ 02/03/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | 50/50
Prostitution will be legal in space. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/03/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Outland
Gravity only exists where there's oxygen.
~ bourbonphantom @ 02/03/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Outland
It's more cost effective to put a criminal in a spacesuit, connected to an air processor, floating in a zero gravity room, than to just put him behind bars. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/03/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Outland
In the future, shotguns are the only firearms that exist. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/03/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Outland
Doctors know that some guys just like to slap hookers around. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/03/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Outland
Shepard is able to smuggle 2 assassins with shotguns on to the mining facility, so they can have a totally not-low-profile gunfight with O'Neal, but he can't smuggle some measly poison into O'Neal's food.
~ bourbonphantom @ 02/03/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Outland
There are no spiders on Io. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/03/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Outland
Decompression elevators have no emergency override. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/03/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Outland
If your child doesn't eat his breakfast, knock out some of his teeth. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/03/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Outland
NYPD snipers leave their safety off at all times. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/03/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Taking of Pelham 1 2 3, The
Russians typically transport items by flying all the way around the bottom of the planet. ~ bourbonphantom @ 02/03/12 link
Rating: 0 (+0/-0) | Whiteout
